I’ll Never Be the “Cool Old Guy” And It Sucks

I’m 53 years old, and it finally hit me... I’ll never be "cool" in the eyes of young people.

When I was growing up, things were different. Older people were respected, even admired. My uncles, my elders, and even the older guys down the street had a kind of authority. They carried wisdom, life experience, and a quiet confidence that made them role models in a way. To me, they weren’t “out of touch”. They were legends. OGs.

But somewhere along the way, that changed.

Today, the younger generation doesn’t look at people my age with respect or curiosity. Instead, they often dismiss us as outdated, irrelevant, or even annoying. We’re not mentors. We’re “has-beens.” And no matter how hard I try, I’ll never be the “cool old guy” that my ancestors were to me.

When I think about my childhood, I realize why my elders had so much respect. Back then it was harder to get knowledge. Outside of an encyclopedia or a library, you were stuck. If you wanted to learn something, you had to ask someone older or more experienced.

Back then tradition mattered. Culture and family history were passed down through stories, and elders were the keepers of those stories. Family stories rarely get passed down today as they did back then. And when you factor in so many blended families in society that we have now, it's even more rare to keep up with family history.

Back then patience was taught. Life wasn’t so fast-paced. People slowed down to listen and genuinely had interest in what you had to say most of the time. And even if they weren't interested, somehow what was being said still stuck somewhere in their mind to be retrieved later.

In short, older people had something that young people needed. Not anymore.

Fast forward to now, and everything has flipped. Information is everywhere. So much of it is probably not true, but verification isn't important in present-day America. With Google, TikTok, and YouTube, young people don’t feel they need to ask anyone for guidance.

Fast forward to now, and even the trends don't last long anymore. I thought my uncles were cool in their 70's clothing but fashion rarely lasts a decade now. By the time something catches on, the next wave has already started.

Fast forward to now and getting older isn't aspirational anymore. Instead of looking forward to maturity, youth culture glorifies staying young forever. To be fair, people my age tend to enjoy the youth culture a little too much as well. Maybe that's where some of the lack of respect comes from, huh? (Message!)

It hurts to admit, but I’ve noticed it in my own life. I walk into a room of young people, and instead of being seen as someone with stories to tell or lessons to share, I’m seen as outdated background noise.

The cruel irony is this: I really wanted to grow into one of those wise, cool elders I once admired. But the role doesn’t even exist anymore—not in the way it used to. I wanted to be the guy who pointed "finger guns" towards a guy and said, "watch out there now, young fella!"

Well, maybe not to that extreme, but you get my drift.

Still, maybe there’s another side to this. Maybe being “cool” to young people shouldn’t be the goal. Maybe it’s enough to pass down values, even if they don’t seem interested now. My goddaughter is 18 years old, and she listens to me still. We'll see how long that lasts. Her brother pretty much stopped at 20 years old, but I still think that he gets what I'm saying most of the time.

Maybe it’s about leading by example, showing resilience, patience, and grace. That's always easy, right? Just exist and keep doing what I've been doing, and it will be recognized.  I can always hope.

Maybe the respect comes later, when they’re older and finally understand. Only time will tell. Maybe I'll won't be too senile to recognize it if it does.

Because deep down, I know my uncles weren’t “cool” because they tried to impress anyone. They were cool because they were authentic, grounded, and unapologetically themselves. And that's all I ever strive to be. The best version of me that I can offer the world.

I'll never be the “cool old guy", and it sucks. But maybe coolness is overrated. What lasts longer than cool is character. And while they may not see it now, one day they might look back and recognize the value of the people they once brushed aside.

Until then, I’ll keep living my life with the quiet dignity my elders showed me. And who knows? Maybe one day, when the noise of youth fades, wisdom will matter again.