Boys who are not challenged and have not accomplished anything turn into immature and irresponsible adults. They will usually shy away from anything they deem difficult from a good job to a good woman.
Ladies, you don't have to date a man like that. And you definitely don't have to have a baby by one.
Ladies, if you are in a relationship and find yourself being a mom more than you are being his woman then something is wrong. If the same Christmas gifts you bought your dude could also make your 12-year old son happy, then doesn't that tell you something? It doesn't mean that guys can't enjoy gaming consoles and sneakers, but if that's what he's all about then ma'am, you have a son! In just a couple of generations, we've gone from dads getting a tie, some socks, or tools for Christmas to shopping for your dude in the same stores that you shop for your son.
Do you know why some guys are bad boyfriends, husbands, and dads? Because no one told them that they sucked as a person before they became a boyfriend, husband, or dad. They kept getting their way and having things done for them until they grew into overgrown children. It's hard to reprogram someone who has never had to be held accountable for his actions. Parents are supposed to teach and guide along with providing shelter and entertainment.
Blame the moms and dads who didn't teach their sons how to be a caring and responsible person. Don't get me wrong. You can't make a guy be responsible. He has to want to do that. However, you can instill some values in him when he's young that may he may adopt into his lifestyle as he grows older.
How many of you parents out there, man or woman, have had conversations with your sons about the importance of doing well on the job? Regardless of the type of job. How many of you have taught your sons not to leech off of women? How many of you have taught your sons that their responsibilities come before their hobbies?
Only you know the truth to those questions. And some of you are not hitting the Like button because you know that I'm talking about you. That's okay. You don't have to like what I say as long as you consider what I'm saying.
Some of you ladies are raising the same men that you despise. Running around talking about, "this is my king". Buying him $200 sneakers and the boy is 14 years old and reading on a 4th grade level. He knows the lyrics to every song by Lil Uzi, Lil Shotgun, Lil Glock or whatever "Lil" is rapping these days, but has to move his lips when reading a Dr. Seuss book. Talking about your son is going to be a "heartbreaker" with the women and then you wind up a 32-year old grandmother because you never taught him how to respect relationships.
And some of you dudes are not raising your sons at all. You're not present. And when you are present, you aren't teaching him anything that can help him develop into a man. You think that playing him in Madden fulfils your duties as a dad. No, it doesn't.
Why are you setting your sons up for failure? Why are you not teaching him to not just to seek book knowledge, but also knowledge of self? Why are you not teaching him how to get and keep a good job? Why are you not instilling the importance of ownership and an excellent credit score?
Why are you not teaching him to establish himself as a man first and then find a woman. And make sure that he is capable of handling that woman.
Guys, your son is a reflection of you. I don't care if he lives with his mom, a son is a reflection of his dad's teachings. If you don't make the effort to have those conversations with your son then who do you think will get the blame if he grows up to be a sorry dude?