There are a lot of bullet points here but stay with me. There’s a certain species of adult who is permanently confused about why life keeps “happening” to them.
Bad luck with money.
Bad luck with dating.
Bad luck with bosses.
At some point, if everywhere you go smells like smoke, it might be worth checking your own pockets for a fire.
And I'm not mocking struggle. Life can be brutal. I get that. The economy is weird. Dating apps are a a joke. People absolutely face real obstacles. But here’s the uncomfortable truth: Most people who claim chronic bad luck aren’t unlucky. They’re resistant to knowledge.
Advice Feels Like an Attack
When someone is stuck financially or romantically, advice doesn’t feel helpful. It feels accusatory.
“Budget better.”
“Work on your communication.”
“Stop chasing people who don’t want you.”
Translation in their head: “You’re the problem.”
That stings. So instead of evaluating the advice, they evaluate the messenger.
“Oh, he got lucky.”
“She had advantages I didn't have.”
“That only works for certain people.”
Pride preserved. Nothing changes.
People Protect Their Story More Than Their Future
If someone has built their identity around being unlucky, overlooked, or misunderstood, changing means admitting something painful: “I’ve been participating in my own stagnation.”
That’s heavy.
It’s easier to believe that the system is rigged, finding love is impossible, yadda, yadda, yadda. There’s comfort in a narrative that removes responsibility. Responsibility requires action. Action requires discomfort. And discomfort is not trending.
Success Advice Is Boring
Financial progress is rarely dramatic. It’s discipline. It’s delayed gratification that involves saying "no" to yourself repeatedly.
Romantic success isn’t mystical either. It’s standards, emotional regulation, self-awareness, presentation, accountability, and consistency.
That's not sexy though. Nobody goes viral saying, “I fixed my spending habits and stopped pursuing dating chaos.”
But post “Nobody values loyalty anymore,” and you’ll get a standing ovation because validation pays faster than transformation.
Some Successful People Do Give Bad Advice Though
Let’s be fair. There are out-of-touch millionaires who think everyone can “just grind harder.” There are married people who forgot what modern dating looks like. There are privileged voices who mistake advantage for wisdom.
Not all advice is good advice. But here’s the test:
If multiple financially stable people tell you some version of:
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Increase your value.
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Spend less than you earn.
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Build leverage.
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Be consistent.
And multiple emotionally stable couples say:
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Choose better.
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Communicate clearly.
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Work on yourself.
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Stop chasing chaos.
At some point, the pattern isn’t coincidence. It's the real deal. We need to stop trying to protect our ego all while suffering the consequences of it. It's okay to admit "I don't know everything". I've said many times in this blog before that I'm "forever under construction". I'll never be a finished product because there is still room for me to grow (hopefully not physically - LOL).
Common sense isn’t cruel. It’s corrective.
And sometimes the most compassionate thing you can tell someone is this: "You’re not cursed. You’re just resisting."
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