Treat Mothers With The Respect They're Due

I have to admit that Mother's Day hasn't been quite the same for me since my mom passed away in 2012.

I'm blessed to still have my grandmother who is 97 years old and also I still get gifts from my late wife's mom. But, the day still seems incomplete without my mother.

My mom's name was Mary. She was 69 years old when she passed in June 2012 from cancer. She was diagnosed around 2009 and it slowly ate away at her.

My mom spent the last month of her life in the hospital. One of the toughest moments of my life was when I was feeding her one evening because she was unable to feed herself. I thought about how she fed me as a baby and now here it was I was doing the same for her. It took everything within me to not cry in front of her and I'll never forget that moment. The amount of appreciation for every she did for me in my life swelled up inside of me and almost exploded in a wave of emotions at that very instant.

But, I managed to keep it together. In that moment, all I could think about were the many instances that she made sacrifices for me. Helping me with homework. Taking me to practice when my dad had to work. Being a taxi for me and my friend, Shawn, or my cousin, Jerome, to go to the mall arcade to play video games. So many times, she put off what she wanted to do to make sure that my brother and I were happy.

I'm so glad that she had an opportunity to retire and actually enjoy her life before she got sick. She loved to go fishing and she loved to visit casinos. And she did that very often for about five to seven years before she got too weak to go. The morning she died, I remember the emptiness I felt. When the coroners took her from the hospital room, I felt as if I should go with them to accompany her. I didn't want her to be alone although she'd passed away.  Because she had always been there for me.

I guess that the message that I want to pass on to all of the guys out there is don't take your mom for granted. If she was good to you then do twice as much as you can for her when you get in a situation to do so. And for you guys who are husbands or have children with a woman, you're not exempt from this either.

Husbands, treat your wife right. Spend equal time with your children and allow your wife some alone time. It's not a woman's job to take care of kids. That responsibility belongs to both parents. Do your share. Period.

And for guys who have kids by a woman and you don't have custody of them and don't live with her, please pick up your kids as often as you can. Don't think that just because you get them every other weekend (after she's had them for 12 days straight) that you're doing something special.  Just because you and her are no longer together doesn't mean that their mother is no longer important to you. She's raising your kids! You need her to be at her best which means you need to relieve her whenever possible. Allow her time to go out or have a spa day or do whatever it is she wants to do. Her peace of mind will allow her to be the best parent she can be.  Your kids deserve that.

I'm ranting, but I'm saying all of this to say: treat mothers with the respect they're due. And I'm not belittling the roles of dads because they are equally as important. We all have a special bond with each active parent. And mothers have a special place in our hearts because we all shared a heartbeat with them at some point of their pregnancy with us. Do right by them and let them feel the love every day of the year and not just on Mother's Day.

Being A Gentleman Is Lame

There's no shame in being nice to a woman. Chivalry is cool. But make no mistake about it, women don't care for old school gentlemen these days. If you overdo it with a woman and try to overly-impress her to win her affection then you're probably wasting your time.

Women in 2020 don't really want to be treated like a lady. That was cool in the 60's, but not so much now.  Women in 2020 are independent. They don't want another person to have to think for. Especially someone who is grown.

A woman wants a man who can be in charge. Not necessarily of her, but of himself and the situations he finds himself in. If something breaks, can he get it fixed? If the household suffers financially, can he pick up the slack? If she has a bad day, can he push the right buttons to make her forget about it?

Being a man isn't about being "nice". It's about being emotionally stronger than your woman and being her rock. She doesn't need to be treated her like she's fragile. She needs to be treated like she's important.

No Sports? Now What?

Never in my adult life has there ever been a period of time that I couldn't turn on TV and find some sports to watch.  I will pretty much watch any sport just because I love the spirit of athletic competition.  But here comes this funky COVID-19 ruining things for me and millions of others around the world.  It's way too early for an April Fool's Day joke.

The coronavirus has turned into a pandemic and sporting events are being either suspended indefinitely or canceled.  And I totally understand the seriousness of it all.  This virus is spreading like the flu and is causing mass hysteria around the world.  It sucks that it took something of this magnitude to get people to do the things they should have been doing since being old enough to attend kindergarten: wash their hands regularly and cover their mouth when they sneeze/cough.  

Without sports I'll find more time to blog, clear my DVR and read some more.  And of course, I'll tune into the reality show known as "world news" to see how our elected "leaders" are handling this crisis.  I truly hate politics when it comes to emergencies.  The people are usually secondary to political agendas.  Politicians aren't beneath using a crisis to further their agenda.  Here are some examples:

• Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, apparently tried to pass a coronavirus relief bill that came with an abortion-funding loophole chaser.  This is not the time to take advantage of the situation to get a bill passed.  Shame, Nancy!  
• President Trump banned travel to the U.S. except for in the UK and Ireland.  Not because they're coronavirus-free, but I'm guessing because he has golf resorts in those two countries.  The UK and Ireland have more cases of coronavirus then some of the other countries in the travel ban.  Greed.
• There's talk about offering corporate welfare to the airlines because people aren't traveling right now.  These companies fleece the general public around each holiday by jacking up already-high prices and now they need a handout?  Ridiculous.
• Bottled water and other essentials are slowly creeping up in price during a time of need.  Anything for an extra buck, right?

Corporations are still taking advantage of U.S. citizens despite the seriousness of the crisis.  Yet we still vote the same people into office each term who allow these companies to do so.  They should drug test all voters.  

As for the coronavirus that has taken over our lives as we know it, all we can do is wait and see what happens with all of this.  Are we closer to the movie "28 Days Later"?  Lord, I hope not.