Teach Your Sons How To Be Men

If parents would teach their sons how to handle their responsibilities when they are young, then someone else's daughter won't have to do so when they are grown. 

Boys who are not challenged and have not accomplished anything turn into immature and irresponsible adults. They will usually shy away from anything they deem difficult from a good job to a good woman.

Ladies, you don't have to date a man like that. And you definitely don't have to have a baby by one. 

Ladies, if you are in a relationship and find yourself being a mom more than you are being his woman then something is wrong. If the same Christmas gifts you bought your dude could also make your 12-year old son happy, then doesn't that tell you something? It doesn't mean that guys can't enjoy gaming consoles and sneakers, but if that's what he's all about then ma'am, you have a son! In just a couple of generations, we've gone from dads getting a tie, some socks, or tools for Christmas to shopping for your dude in the same stores that you shop for your son. 

Do you know why some guys are bad boyfriends, husbands, and dads? Because no one told them that they sucked as a person before they became a boyfriend, husband, or dad. They kept getting their way and having things done for them until they grew into overgrown children. It's hard to reprogram someone who has never had to be held accountable for his actions.  Parents are supposed to teach and guide along with providing shelter and entertainment.

Blame the moms and dads who didn't teach their sons how to be a caring and responsible person. Don't get me wrong.  You can't make a guy be responsible. He has to want to do that. However, you can instill some values in him when he's young that may he may adopt into his lifestyle as he grows older.  

How many of you parents out there, man or woman, have had conversations with your sons about the importance of doing well on the job? Regardless of the type of job. How many of you have taught your sons not to leech off of women? How many of you have taught your sons that their responsibilities come before their hobbies? 

Only you know the truth to those questions. And some of you are not hitting the Like button because you know that I'm talking about you. That's okay. You don't have to like what I say as long as you consider what I'm saying. 

Some of you ladies are raising the same men that you despise.  Running around talking about, "this is my king".  Buying him $200 sneakers and the boy is 14 years old and reading on a 4th grade level.  He knows the lyrics to every song by Lil Uzi, Lil Shotgun, Lil Glock or whatever "Lil" is rapping these days, but has to move his lips when reading a Dr. Seuss book.  Talking about your son is going to be a "heartbreaker" with the women and then you wind up a 32-year old grandmother because you never taught him how to respect relationships.  

And some of you dudes are not raising your sons at all. You're not present. And when you are present, you aren't teaching him anything that can help him develop into a man. You think that playing him in Madden fulfils your duties as a dad.  No, it doesn't.  

Why are you setting your sons up for failure? Why are you not teaching him to not just to seek book knowledge, but also knowledge of self?  Why are you not teaching him how to get and keep a good job?  Why are you not instilling the importance of ownership and an excellent credit score?  

Why are you not teaching him to establish himself as a man first and then find a woman. And make sure that he is capable of handling that woman. 

Guys, your son is a reflection of you. I don't care if he lives with his mom, a son is a reflection of his dad's teachings. If you don't make the effort to have those conversations with your son then who do you think will get the blame if he grows up to be a sorry dude?

John Lennon Shot: 40 Years Later

Most of the things that I ultimately learned about John Lennon came later in life.  I was too young to remember the Beatles.  But I've heard tons of stories about how talented of a musician he was and it is sad that the world lost a musical genius on this particular day 40 years ago.

I remember watching a Monday Night Football game between the Dolphins and Patriots when Howard Cosell announced during the game that Beatles singer, John Lennon, had been shot and killed.  There was no internet back then, so radio and TV were your only sources for breaking news.    

I remember asking my dad why someone would kill somebody who was famous.  I was about 9 years old at the time and I thought that everyone loved celebrities and would never harm one.  I don't recall what his answer was to me, but I just remember going to bed that night wondering what in the world caused someone to shoot John Lennon.  

As I got older, I've learned that celebrity shootings weren't so rare after all and that the reasons for them weren't always good either.  My favorite singer, Sam Cooke, was shot in 1964 in what was called a "justifiable homicide" although most think that he was murdered for being a black man with a white woman.  Marvin Gaye was shot in 1984 during a family dispute.  Selena in 1995 by a crazed fan.  Tupac, Biggie, Roger Troutman, Jam Master Jay.  The list goes on and on.  

Lennon's murder was probably my first introduction to the underbelly of the real world.  There isn't a person on this planet that is loved by everyone.  Someone will always have a problem with you or seek something to gain by harming you (physically or emotionally).  

I'm not a Beatles fan or anything.  I own none of their albums.  But I understand what they brought to society by way of their music and I respect their craft.  It's a shame that folks have prematurely taken from us some of the most gifted people in our society.  

There Are Still Good People Out There

So, back in the summer, some time in August, I ran an errand to pick up some Talk 2 Q face masks from a friend of mine.  I was about five minutes from my destination when I hit a pothole and blew out my passenger side front tire.  I pulled over near a church parking lot and surveyed the damage.  The temperature was in the 90's on this particular day and I'm sure that the heat index was well over 100.  

Anyway, I open my trunk and start to unload my spare tire and equipment that I need to change the flat tire.   As I'm pulling things out of the trunk, a minivan pulls up beside me.  It's a white lady, maybe in her mid-to-late 50's, kind of heavyset.  You know, the type of person you would envision if someone asked you to think of what a grandmother looks like.  She asked me what was wrong and I told her that I had a blowout.  She asked me if I had any water.  I told her that I did have a bottle of water in my car.  She said that it was too hot and I needed more.   

She then proceed to get out of her van and go into her backseat.  She emerged from the other side of the van with six bottles of water in her arms.  She said that if she knew how to change a tire that she would help me, but she wanted me to at least stay hydrated in the process. I thanked her profusely as I accepted the bottles.  She got back in her van, wished me a nice day, and drove off. 

I resumed working on my tire and I realized that my tire iron wouldn't fit the lug nuts on the flat.  So, I'm unable to remove the flat tire and put on the spare.  I'm racking my brain trying to figure out why the tire iron will not fit.  I then realize that without that, I'm stuck.  So, I grab my cell to call my dad to get him to bring his.  It will take him about 30 minutes to arrive, so I sit inside my car to turn on the A/C. 

A mid-sized sedan then pulls up in front of me.  A black man gets out.  He's probably early 30's, wearing an undershirt or what some people refer to as a "wife beater shirt".  Sounds terrible to say that out loud on the air, but you know the shirt.  He has a few tattoos and has the look of a construction worker, so to speak.  He asked me what was wrong and I recited my story.  He told me that he had a lug wrench in my car that would fit my tire.  He retrieved it from his trunk as I slowly got out of the car.   

I called my dad to tell him that I didn't need him to drive all the way across town and while I was doing that, dude started changing my tire.  After I got off of the phone with my dad, I tried to stop him and let him know that I could take it from here.  He simply replied, "It's all good, man.  I used to work at Goodyear.  I can change a tire in my sleep". 

Dude had the tire changed in a matter of minutes.  I offered to Cashapp him some money for his troubles, but he refused.  He said that he saw an opportunity to help and did so.  I thanked him and he drove on. 

I guess I shared all of this just to say that there are still some good people out here.  Social media will make you lose faith in all of humanity because of the level of selfishness and ignorance that we see on there every day.  But, I had two people, each who appeared to be from different walks of life, stop to assist me.  An older white woman and a younger black man.  A conservative-looking lady and an urban-looking, for lack of a better phrase, dude.  

Good people come in all shape, sizes, ages, and colors.  Stop letting social media and the talking heads on the news continue to divide us.  There are no secrets in getting along with people.  Just be decent and the rest will work itself out.

Who Is Responsible for Birth Control?

When two people who aren't married decide to have sex, who is responsible for birth control?  It sounds like a tough question, doesn't it? 

Well, it's not. Despite the fact that people have argued this question for decades is beyond me. The answer is plain and simple: the person who doesn't want the obligation is the one responsible for preventing it. 

Period.  

Guys, let's say that you don't want a child brought into this world, and the reason doesn't matter.  It can be because: 

• You don't want the financial obligation.  
• You don't want the responsibility of being a dad. 
• You don't like the woman you're about to have sex with enough to raise a child with her. 
• Maybe you just hate kids. 

The reason doesn't matter.  It's your responsibility to ensure that conception never happens.  The sperm has to reach the egg in order to create a child.  Stop the sperm and there won't be a child.  You can't blame the woman if she ends up pregnant because you didn't protect yourself.  It's like blaming someone for having a wet floor when the plumbing is leaking.  Yeah, you could put a bucket under the leak and protect the carpet, but isn't the most reliable way to stop the leak is at the source?

If a guy doesn't want a baby then he can just about guarantee that it doesn't happen by simply wrapping up.  That's a lot better for everyone than just having a kid and then abandoning the child and the mother or not taking care of them adequately.  

And ladies, while you're laughing at me getting on the fellas, let me talk to you all for a minute...  

It's not a man's fault if you get pregnant from unprotected sex.  If you think that the pull-out method is foolproof then ma'am, you're the fool and the baby is proof.  Please don't rely on that or trust that he will even do it.

It's pretty much a given that if a woman has a child out of wedlock that she's going to be the primary person to care for it.  And if she doesn't want to deal with factors such as:

• Not being able to afford the child.
• Not having accommodations for someone to watch the child when she's unavailable.
• Not wanting to tether herself to a dude who isn't worth it. 
• Or maybe she, too, just hate kids.

The reason matters not, but, it's still your responsibility to ensure that conception never happens. 

One of my favorite comedians, Tyler Craig, who tragically passed away earlier this year, use to always end his jokes with a moral, so I will end this blog post by saying, "and the moral of the story is:" It takes two to make a baby, but only one to stop it. 

And the person who doesn't want the obligation should be the one to stop it. 

Every time a man goes in unprotected then he's obviously cool with possibly having a baby.  

Every time a woman allows a man to have sex without some form of birth control then she's obviously cool with possibly having a baby as well. It doesn't take a genius to understand how pregnancy works. 

All of these years, men and women have been finger-pointing when the answer to this question has always been and always will be, "you".

Why Do We Need A Blackout Day?

Okay, so I talked to a friend of mine named TeAndra a while back and she brought something up in our conversation that I hadn't thought about before.  Why do we have to have designated days to support black-owned business?

I think back to stories from the 50's and 60's that my father shared with me years ago.  He said that every weekend, black people would frequent a spot in Jackson, MS in an area now known as the Farish Street District.  Farish Street was a black community and there were a lot of black shops and restaurants in that area.  That area thrived from the black dollars that went into it. 

Fast forward to after the Civil Rights Era.  No more colored water fountains.  No more colored-only entrances.  All of that stuff abolished.  And that was the origin of the collapsing of black businesses in the Jackson area.  Black people started taking their business to white establishments and ultimately stopped patronizing their own.  That area of Jackson has been struggling ever since it can't seem to come close to recapturing what it once had.  

Now, if you fast forward to present day, we have what some people call "black out days".  We use black businesses so infrequently now that we have to remind the world to take a day to patronize a black-owned business.

How sad is that?  Why do we not support our own.  And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that black people should not support people of other races, I'm just trying to figure out why we appear to be the only race of people who don't keep our dollars within our communities.

We approach black businesses in one or two ways: 1) we want some sort of hook up or discount.  And 2) we have a zero tolerance for anything that we interpret as bad customer service.

C'mon, people.  Let's stop being stuck on stupid.  There's a reason why you've heard of different parts of major cities devoted to certain ethnic groups.  You've heard of Chinatown, Little Italy, and things of that nature.  Why isn't there a well-known community in every major city predominantly serviced by black-owned businesses?  I ain't never heard of Blacktown.  

Well, that might be offensive to some, but the point I'm trying to make is: stop being on a short fuse when it come to black-owned businesses.  There are a lot of professional people out here who just want to make a living like everyone else, but they can't do it because your expectations of them is unreasonable.  Give them the same level of patience you give the rest of the world.

We still go to fast food restaurant chains regularly and put up with bad attitudes from the moment we place our orders.  We still go to big box superstores with 20 registers and only 2 of them are open and will sit in line long enough to play out all of your Candy Crush lives.  But let a black-owned business be 1 minute late or forget to take the tomatoes off of your hamburger order and it's, "man, I can't stand black folks.  They don't do anything right!  I ain't ever coming back!"

Is that how you really feel?  SMH.

"Nope! No racism here!"

A picture says a thousand words.  

The first step to fixing a problem is to first admit that there is one.  A lot of the police departments in this country seem to not want to do that.  So many of the politicians in this country seem to not want to do that.  Many citizens in this country seem to not want to do that.  We're just walking around with blinders on like the Netflix movie, "Bird Box".

We just keep walking around aimlessly as if nothing is going on.  "Nope.  No racism here!" 

Now the NBA players are boycotting.  I'm not sure what their endgame is, but I stand behind them exercising their right to peacefully protest.  Anything that raises awareness to people of color being fed up with status quo is just fine with me.

What was the final straw that prompted this boycott?  A knuckle-headed teen shot and killed two people last night because he wanted to be a cop.  How telling is that?  And when the cops were responding to the scene, they drove right past the 17-year old, rifle-toting white kid with his hands held up in the air.  Drove right past him!  Why?  Because evidently he didn't appear to be a threat to them.  But a 12 year old black kid named Tamir Rice was shot and killed seconds after police arrived on the scene of a playground where he was playing with a toy gun.  And Tamir, unfortunately, is just one of many examples.

Racism is real.  White Privilege is real.  Racial biases are real.

What will it take for us to make you see that?

Pick A Bale Of Cotton

Sometimes these blog posts just writes themselves.  An Arkansas senator named Tom Cotton said that slavery was a "necessary evil".  Well, unlike our American History books, to put things into context, he said that, "As the Founding Fathers said, it was the necessary evil on which the union was built."

This conversation came up during an interview about how slavery should be taught in schools.  Cotton wants to cut funding for schools who use curriculum from the "1619 Project".

You don't have to be a history major to know that a lot of foul stuff was happening to black people in the 1600's.  That project was created to help students understand how this country was built on the backs of slaves.  It's a painful story to tell, but it does help to enlighten those who know very little about how this country came to be what it is today.  In no way, shape, or form is murdering, beating, and raping a group of people a "necessary evil".  It's evil, but it's very unnecessary.  I don't care in what context you attempt to use it.  However, he later said on Twitter that he wasn't endorsing the Founding Fathers stance on slavery.  Blah, blah, blah.  Cotton also made quotes that insinuated that despite America being a flawed country, it is a great country and he doesn't want it portrayed as being formed by a bunch of greedy, racists crooks.

And this is a huge problem that I have with American History school books.  They are incomplete.  They don't tell the real story of how this country came to be.  The treatment received by minorities would bring about a ton of shame onto a lot of prominent people.  Especially if names were mentioned.

Case in point, Senator Cotton is a descendant of slave owners.  There are documents floating around online now that show a will from his great-great-great-great (I'm unsure of how many "greats") grandfather leaving slaves to an heir.  So, I'm guessing that having to explain that part of history is not something he's wanting to get into.  In fact, I'm sure that a lot of surnames of prominent people would come up if we did a deep dive into the origin of slave owners.  There are a lot of rich people in this country who had wealth passed down to them from those who made it off of the backs of treacherous acts.

It's ironic that a man with the last name of "Cotton" has a problem with how slavery is taught in schools.  History should be no longer "white-washed" to tell "his story".  It should be told in its entirety so that people can begin to understand how "The Greatest Country in the World" has a lumpy carpet from the things being swept under the rug.

10 Years of Blogging

Me from 10 years ago

Wow.  Yesterday was my blog's 10th birthday and I was so busy with my radio show that I forgot about it!

It's hard to believe that a simple blurb that I posted on 7/15/10 has led to almost 700 more posts.  And I absolutely appreciate all of you for reading them.  Even if you only read one.

And 1.25m views later, I guess that I'm still doing my thing, albeit not nearly as often as it once was.  I started my radio show about 7 months after my blog and spent a lot of time building it.  It really became my focus around 2013 after the passing of The Mrs.  I put all of my spare time into it to help ease the pain of losing her.  Plus I'd just lost my mom five months prior.  2012 was rough.

But thanks to loyal readers supporting me, a radio show audience, and the love of family and friends, I made it through and I've made the most of my life since.  I have a job that I love.  I have a woman that I love.  And I have a family that loves me.  You can't ask for much more!

I'm not sure how long I'll continue to blog.  Maybe this is something that I will do until the day I expire.  Who knows?  I could be 88 years old and on here complaining about something President Malia Obama did (I'm assuming that we will have at least a few female presidents in the next 40 years).

In the meantime, I'll continue to do my thing here and over at T2Q.  I have fun bringing crazy stories and information to the masses and I hope that you all have enjoyed it as well.  Thanks for hanging in their with me through 10 years of funny, happy, crazy, informative, and sometimes sad blog posts.  I hope that I can fulfill 10 more if possible!

Me today. What a difference 10 years makes, huh?

Combating Social Injustice Issues in America

I was fortunate enough to be tagged for a discussion about racism along with some very insightful minds. 

You can check out the discussion here.

I participated in the second episode of the Holism For Advancement Roundtable hosted by Dr. Herman SJr. himself.

I've been fortunate enough to interview him a couple of times on T2Q and as he usually does, he dropped science on this topic as well.  His other guest, Miguel Conner, was amazing in establishing a base to some of the societal problems we endure as a country today.

So, please enjoy this discussion and share, share, share!  The world needs to hear more insightful opinions on race and not the same old babble and catch phrases.

Seeing & Combating Inculcated, "Invisible" Fundamentals That Create Negative Systems 

* (Please excuse the audio-only format due to technical issues) *

This is the second show of the Holism For Advancement Roundtable founded by Dr. HermanSJr. to present the most powerful, no-nonsense, science-backed solutions to highly-complex world issues that can be used immediately to begin forcing step-change in people's lives across all landscapes (business, educational, personal, social).  

Experts: Dr. Chandra Babu (Ph.D.) | Right.Academy | (not present in show due to technical issues) Miguel Conner (B.A.) | TheGodAboveGod.com 
Quincy "Q" Shelton | Talk2Q.com 
Dr. HermanSJr. (A.A., B.A., B.Msc., M.A., M.Msc., Mpsy.D.) | DrHermanSJr.com 

This roundtable is based on Dr. HermanSJr.'s Holistic Vision program taught to experts and laypeople across countries, industries, and languages to force step-change via game-changing action and thought. 

Start the Holistic Vision program now for your business, educational, personal goals at https://DrHermanSJr.com.

Welcome To The World Of Valesia Rose!

Check out her exclusive photos and videos over at her place at www.OnlyFans.com/ValesiaRose!

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Your Generation Doesn't Want A Relationship

Why are we fooling ourselves? A majority of people no longer desire to have the spouse, 3 kids, dog, and white picket fence any more. Because society no longer glorifies being married. Sure, we love weddings, but not marriages.

I'm a 70's baby and I think that my generation is the last who really care about being married. A ton of people my age have either tried it or wanted to, but 1980 and beyond, I'm not so sure.

• You want someone to do happy hour with you every now and then. 
• You want a plus one to social gatherings. 
• You want someone to text you "good morning" and "good night". 
• You want someone make small talk with via text when there's a break at work. 
• You want someone to contact to fill that intimacy void when you're lonely and in need of something physical.

But you don't want all of this at the same time. Or sometimes not even with the same person.

• You want to feel like you're in a relationship without actually being in a relationship. 
•  You don't want the commitment. 
• You don't want the pressure of remembering and shopping for anniversaries and birthdays. 
• You don't want the difficult conversations that come along with finding long-term compatibility. 
• You don't want the same person in your face every... single... day. 

How many times have we seen someone post on Facebook about how they've been single for "X" number of years?  "Why don't I have someone already?"

Because you haven't put in the effort. That "everyone is a winner" mentality you learned as a kid is the reason you're sitting around waiting on your participant trophy.

• You don't want to invest in a relationship, but you want to reap all of the benefits. 
• You don't want to make yourself a better candidate for someone to want you because you work harder on our Match.com profile than you do on your personality. 

 So, let's just admit it: you live in the generation that doesn't really want relationships.  You want something that is a bit relationship-ish.  Luckily for you, there's an app for that!

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I Don't See The Big Deal With 'Gone With The Wind'

Maybe it's just me, but movies aren't supposed to be real, right?  Some are based on true stories, but a movie is still entertainment when it's all said and done.  So, why does a movie need a disclaimer before it's aired on HBO Max?

'Gone With The Wind' is one of those movies that critics have raved about for decades.  I've never seen the movie nor do I care to do so.  It's just not my thing.  However, I have read about how black people were depicted in the movie as "willing slaves" or "incompetent".  Because of this, we end up with this movie that's been around since before my dad was born coming with a warning label as if we're incompetent as well.

Now, because I've not seen the movie then maybe I don't understand the extremes of which the slaves may have been depicted.  However, I don't think that you throw a disclaimer on it because of it.  Does that mean that we'll have disclaimers for music videos that show women being degraded by men?  Do we have a four minute speech at the beginning of "Old Yeller" because of what people may perceive as animal cruelty?

Look, slavery happened.  And it infuriates me to know that people were treated like that.  My people.  But, TV is make-believe.  The reason why 'GWTW' hasn't bothered me in my 48 years on this planet is because I haven't watched it.  And that's what I would advise people to do if they feel outraged about how blacks were depicted in this film.  Just don't watch.  Don't even sweat the "gone with the wind plantation" mentality.

Who cares if some white people watch it and get their jollies from seeing black people mistreated?  They were racists anyway if they got enjoyment out of that, so why make a big deal out of people who probably aren't going to change?

I don't want to see lengthy disclaimers in front of my movies due to racial insensitivty, excessive violence, gratuitous booty shots, or whatever.  No apologies in front of "A Time To Kill" or "Mississippi Burning" or whatever unflattering movies that may be out there.  And there are thousands of them.

Most people generally know what they are getting when they sit down to watch a movie.  And if they don't know and happen to get a few minutes into it to discover that there's something about it that they don't like then they can change the channel.

Maybe there's a discussion that can be had about whatever was unpleasing about the movie, but please don't force movies to do this regularly.  Let these movies serve as talking points for productive discussions about racism.  Although I appreciate the effort, but disclaimers still won't change the systemic racism in this country in my opinion or even come close.  That's an entirely different discussion.

No More Wall Street Bailouts!

"Every time I come in the kitchen, you in the kitchen." - Mr. Jones from the movie Friday.

That's what it seems like every time this country gets into a financial bind.  Every time the citizens get hungry, big corporations are already in the kitchen with their heads in the refrigerator.

The 2020 COVID-19 pandemic led to multi-trillion dollar bailouts of businesses and citizens in this country.  I get the citizens needing a hand, but huge corporations?  Again?

Why is it that these billion dollar corporations (that boasts huge profits annually) always seem to run out of money?  

That's a rhetorical question.  We all know it's because of campaign contributions.  Politicians wouldn't dare turn their backs on their buddies when there's a penny to be made.  Get them re-elected and you'll never be broke.

We've heard the phrase "too big to fail" being thrown around left and right, but is that really true?  Can you be too big of a company to fold?  And if that's the case, then what's the incentive for these companies to do anything competent when they know that Uncle Sam is going to bail them out each time they make a mistake?

I've seen a few local businesses in my hometown closed down.  Not because they had poor service or offered an inferior product.  But because the bailouts didn't do enough (if anything) for them.  They don't have the billion dollar profits to fall back on and friends in the White House to throw a few dollar their way.  

Times only get hard for those in the lower tax brackets.  And it's those in the lower tax brackets whose funds are paying to sustain these corporations.  It still won't prevent layoffs and it still won't prevent them from fleecing you for profits sometime in the future.

I'm going to need these incompetent CEOs who can't stretch billion dollar annual profits over the course of a few months to stay out of this country's kitchen.

White People: Do Your Part

I don't know if my white friends understand the seriousness of this or not. Every black person has a story like this, including myself. Not all have peaceful endings. 

I don't want people to think that this stuff is new just because social media allows people to plaster it all over the web these days. Since I was a teen, I've experienced many incidents about if I "belonged" somewhere. 

Do people not realize that calling the cops on black people for no legit reason these days should be a form of criminal negligence?  If you think that someone doesn't belong then call a building manager, not the police!  Find out the truth instead of trying to intimidate someone.  White people who threaten to call the cops on black people should know that the end-result will be the severe mistreatment, and in some cases, death, of that black person.  

Until white people actually speak to their peers about correcting it then I'm afraid that it's never going to cease. Racism isn't a conversation for black people to have.  It's a conversation for white people.  White people started racism, so they have to end it.  Minorities can stomp, march, and hold signs all they want, but until white people bring this conversation into their churches and homes, it's never going to end.

I grew up in a predominantly-white school system and I had quite a few white friends. Not all white people are prejudice.  But, understand that it only takes a few dummies to make everyone look bad. Weed these people out already! Being silient is just allowing you to get unfairly lumped in with the rest these idiots. 

I won't hold my breath and wait on this to be shared, but know that an uncomfortable discussion is what it's going to take to reduce the number of prejudice people in the world like this guy.

Police Only Protect And Serve Each Other

So, yet another video surfaces of police using excessive force during an arrest.  The suspect later died after being taken into custody. 

During the video, the man pleaded for mercy and indicated that he couldn't breathe quite a few times.  He kept trying to adjust his head to find relief, but the number of cops on him wouldn't allow him comfort.  Not to mention the one cop who applied pressure from a knee to the back of the man's neck.  He was clearly increasing the pressure the more the man appeared to be adjusting to get some air.

Despite the man being in custody and no longer a threat, this cop still felt the need to "punish" him by keeping the knee in the back of the man's neck which ultimately may have led to the trauma that killed the man.  The onlookers pleaded with the cop to ease up. They begged the police to just put the guy in the squad car.  They told them to check the man's pulse when he became unresponsive.

The cops did none of that.  An ambulance was called, but the man appears to have died before they arrived.

Look,  I understand that police are humans and get frustrated, too.  They get tired of people who may run and / or resist.  But some cops don't realize how what they do comes off as severe bullying to the general public.  Especially minorities.  Once the suspect is subdued, the fight is over.  You don't have the right to continue to punish someone who is in handcuffs and not in a position to be a threat to anyone.

I have met some really good cops in my life.  Cops who wouldn't dare think of intentionally harming someone.  But until THEY start to speak out against this, we'll continue to see videos like these.  When was the last time you saw a cop testify against another cop for police brutality?  Wait.  When's the first time you've ever seen that?

This "loyalty to the uniform" stuff needs to end if they ever want to truly gain a reputation for "protecting and serving" the people.  Because right now, the police only "protect and serve" each other.

How To Listen To The Talk 2 Q Radio Show

Click here.  It's just that simple. :)

The Talk 2 Q Radio Show is a show for adults to get together and rant about whatever the trending topic may be. Relationships, race relations, politics, sports, and more! If you have something to get off your chest, then join the chat room and / or call in and let your opinions be known!

Unlike most shows where you simply listen to the host, I allow you a chance to do the talking. You have the opportunity to express an opinion or rant on a subject. I want to hear what you have to say which is why I named the show "Talk 2 Q" and not "Listen 2 Q."

The Call-in Number: (516) 595-8306. There is also the aforementioned chat room where you can interact with other listeners and ask questions to the host and / or guests.


Okay, enough of that. Let's talk about what I'm really about. Where do I start? I'm old school. That's an understatement to any of you who have followed me for a while, but it's a true statement. Being blessed with a two-parent household as a child, I was raised with many traditional values from the Hospitality State of Mississippi.

Examples: taking my hat/cap off before entering someone's home, holding a door for a lady to enter first, a firm handshake, making eye contact when speaking with people, and being accountable for my actions to name a few.

As crazy as it sounds, those things are becoming a lost art. Too many boys out there lack the man training that is necessary to continue the dwindling cycle of main components of manhood. Pride, responsibility, and accountability have been replaced with entitlement, dependency, and deflection. 

These are the things that fuel the passion for my radio show. I want to bring morals and values back to mainstream America one show at a time. Because although there are plenty of outlets for people to express themselves freely, there isn't one quite like T2Q.

Direct. Real. Uncensored. 

Why? Because "some things need to be said."

Treat Mothers With The Respect They're Due

I have to admit that Mother's Day hasn't been quite the same for me since my mom passed away in 2012.

I'm blessed to still have my grandmother who is 97 years old and also I still get gifts from my late wife's mom. But, the day still seems incomplete without my mother.

My mom's name was Mary. She was 69 years old when she passed in June 2012 from cancer. She was diagnosed around 2009 and it slowly ate away at her.

My mom spent the last month of her life in the hospital. One of the toughest moments of my life was when I was feeding her one evening because she was unable to feed herself. I thought about how she fed me as a baby and now here it was I was doing the same for her. It took everything within me to not cry in front of her and I'll never forget that moment. The amount of appreciation for every she did for me in my life swelled up inside of me and almost exploded in a wave of emotions at that very instant.

But, I managed to keep it together. In that moment, all I could think about were the many instances that she made sacrifices for me. Helping me with homework. Taking me to practice when my dad had to work. Being a taxi for me and my friend, Shawn, or my cousin, Jerome, to go to the mall arcade to play video games. So many times, she put off what she wanted to do to make sure that my brother and I were happy.

I'm so glad that she had an opportunity to retire and actually enjoy her life before she got sick. She loved to go fishing and she loved to visit casinos. And she did that very often for about five to seven years before she got too weak to go. The morning she died, I remember the emptiness I felt. When the coroners took her from the hospital room, I felt as if I should go with them to accompany her. I didn't want her to be alone although she'd passed away.  Because she had always been there for me.

I guess that the message that I want to pass on to all of the guys out there is don't take your mom for granted. If she was good to you then do twice as much as you can for her when you get in a situation to do so. And for you guys who are husbands or have children with a woman, you're not exempt from this either.

Husbands, treat your wife right. Spend equal time with your children and allow your wife some alone time. It's not a woman's job to take care of kids. That responsibility belongs to both parents. Do your share. Period.

And for guys who have kids by a woman and you don't have custody of them and don't live with her, please pick up your kids as often as you can. Don't think that just because you get them every other weekend (after she's had them for 12 days straight) that you're doing something special.  Just because you and her are no longer together doesn't mean that their mother is no longer important to you. She's raising your kids! You need her to be at her best which means you need to relieve her whenever possible. Allow her time to go out or have a spa day or do whatever it is she wants to do. Her peace of mind will allow her to be the best parent she can be.  Your kids deserve that.

I'm ranting, but I'm saying all of this to say: treat mothers with the respect they're due. And I'm not belittling the roles of dads because they are equally as important. We all have a special bond with each active parent. And mothers have a special place in our hearts because we all shared a heartbeat with them at some point of their pregnancy with us. Do right by them and let them feel the love every day of the year and not just on Mother's Day.

Being A Gentleman Is Lame

There's no shame in being nice to a woman. Chivalry is cool. But make no mistake about it, women don't care for old school gentlemen these days. If you overdo it with a woman and try to overly-impress her to win her affection then you're probably wasting your time.

Women in 2020 don't really want to be treated like a lady. That was cool in the 60's, but not so much now.  Women in 2020 are independent. They don't want another person to have to think for. Especially someone who is grown.

A woman wants a man who can be in charge. Not necessarily of her, but of himself and the situations he finds himself in. If something breaks, can he get it fixed? If the household suffers financially, can he pick up the slack? If she has a bad day, can he push the right buttons to make her forget about it?

Being a man isn't about being "nice". It's about being emotionally stronger than your woman and being her rock. She doesn't need to be treated her like she's fragile. She needs to be treated like she's important.

No Sports? Now What?

Never in my adult life has there ever been a period of time that I couldn't turn on TV and find some sports to watch.  I will pretty much watch any sport just because I love the spirit of athletic competition.  But here comes this funky COVID-19 ruining things for me and millions of others around the world.  It's way too early for an April Fool's Day joke.

The coronavirus has turned into a pandemic and sporting events are being either suspended indefinitely or canceled.  And I totally understand the seriousness of it all.  This virus is spreading like the flu and is causing mass hysteria around the world.  It sucks that it took something of this magnitude to get people to do the things they should have been doing since being old enough to attend kindergarten: wash their hands regularly and cover their mouth when they sneeze/cough.  

Without sports I'll find more time to blog, clear my DVR and read some more.  And of course, I'll tune into the reality show known as "world news" to see how our elected "leaders" are handling this crisis.  I truly hate politics when it comes to emergencies.  The people are usually secondary to political agendas.  Politicians aren't beneath using a crisis to further their agenda.  Here are some examples:

• Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, apparently tried to pass a coronavirus relief bill that came with an abortion-funding loophole chaser.  This is not the time to take advantage of the situation to get a bill passed.  Shame, Nancy!  
• President Trump banned travel to the U.S. except for in the UK and Ireland.  Not because they're coronavirus-free, but I'm guessing because he has golf resorts in those two countries.  The UK and Ireland have more cases of coronavirus then some of the other countries in the travel ban.  Greed.
• There's talk about offering corporate welfare to the airlines because people aren't traveling right now.  These companies fleece the general public around each holiday by jacking up already-high prices and now they need a handout?  Ridiculous.
• Bottled water and other essentials are slowly creeping up in price during a time of need.  Anything for an extra buck, right?

Corporations are still taking advantage of U.S. citizens despite the seriousness of the crisis.  Yet we still vote the same people into office each term who allow these companies to do so.  They should drug test all voters.  

As for the coronavirus that has taken over our lives as we know it, all we can do is wait and see what happens with all of this.  Are we closer to the movie "28 Days Later"?  Lord, I hope not.  

White People Need To Stop Being Racists

This logo is as accurate as it is iconic.  PE#1.

Now that I have your attention, let me give some background on myself to explain why that I think that statement is 100% true: I grew up in a predominantly white school system.  I had a lot of white friends in my childhood, so I saw the good in white people.  I was oblivious to a lot of the atrocities in the U.S. because of the type of education that I received and the environment in which I was raised.

Then I went to an HBCU (Google it if you don't know the acronym) and I met other people who looked like me who had totally different experiences growing up.  By the way, this is generally how one learns about the world.  Being exposed to all walks of life is what expands our way of thinking.  But, back to the topic at hand...

I spent a lot of my youth and some of my adult life explaining to minorities how "the conversation" about racism should be approached with white people.  I found myself speaking from a place that protected the good white people that I knew.  It took growing older in society to realize that they didn't need me to defend them.  Their privilege alone gave them the protection that they needed.

The point I'm trying to make is that black people have no responsibility in stopping racism.  White people do.  And it's always been that way despite how others have tried to spin it over and over again.  It's not a woman's responsibility to have "a discussion" with an abusive husband.  He just needs to recognize that he's wrong and stop abusing her.  See how simple that is?  Problem solved.

We don't need a table of "black leaders" to sit down and discuss why we shouldn't be unlawfully shot by police, denied opportunities for leadership positions from being a CEO of a Fortune 500 company to being an NFL head coach, or refused loans and/or housing based solely on the fact that we are enriched with melanin.  Black people have complained for decades on the things that prevent us from truly being equals in this country, so there's nothing new to talk about.  All white people have to do is stop doing it.  It's just that simple.  Nothing else is required.

And for all white people who have done things to help promote the end of racism, I thank and applaud you.  We wouldn't have made it this far without some of you.  But, you're going to have to do more.  Because in order for you not to be unfairly grouped in with racists, you have to convince the racists to cut it out.  So, it looks like you have the responsibility of helping this madness end.  Not black people.