Tuesday, March 30, 2021

Relationships Are Like Chicken Sandwiches

Before you say anything, no, I haven't completely lost my mind just yet.  I know that the title seems a little crazy, but hopefully, I can convey my point without someone committing me to a mental institution.

Maybe I should have said that "relationships are like fast food restaurants that sell chicken sandwiches".  Meh, that doesn't really flow off of the tongue.

Anyway, let's take Chick-fil-A.  By no means is CFA what I would consider a "sexy" fast food restaurant.  Their restaurants are on the conservative side with no flashy colors or logos.  They don't do gimmicks in order to get your attention, but they keep a line of cars around the building in their drive-thrus.  They attract their customers with consistency, great customer service, and solid food.  They don't open on Sundays because they believe people should have a day off with family.  I guess that makes them thoughtful as well and also shows that they don't focus on money.  

Now let's take a look at Popeyes.  Like CFA, they focus on chicken, but at one time they weren't really known for having a chicken sandwich like CFA.  In the late summer of 2019, they released a chicken sandwich that took the country by storm.  People were lining up around the block for this chicken sandwich.  There were even fights over it.  They'd finally achieved the attention that CFA was getting.  

But, it was temporary because they still didn't focus on the customer.  You didn't get the same friendly service as CFA.  They would run out of food in the middle of the day due to lack of preparation.  You would sometimes wait 30+ minutes to get your food.  

Popeyes had figured out a way that they could get you, but they couldn't keep you.  And because of that, there are no longer lines around the building to get a Popeyes chicken sandwich.  Their success was short-lived.

Now McDonald's, Burger King, and even Taco Bell have joined the chicken sandwich war to try and get a piece of the action.  Really Taco Bell?  I won't even get into any of those places.

Okay, so I said all of that to say: people seem to follow the same path when it comes to relationships.  You have the consistent, always-friendly and reliable person who is just like Chick-fil-A.  You know exactly what you're going to get when you deal with that person.  They may not be the flashiest or the sexiest pick, but they will always come through for you and give you what you need.  Because you are their focus.  You are their priority.

Then you have the person like Popeyes who hits you like a ton of bricks when you first meet them.  Everyone seems to want a piece of them.  They look the part and sound the part at first, but then you find out over time that they're not all that.  They're inconsistent.  They take you for granted and seem to act like they're doing you a favor.  And they're definitely not focused on you or your happiness.

Lastly, you have the people who are like McDonald's, BK, and Taco Bell.  Monkey-see, monkey-do.  They will do whatever they can just to be noticed although most people will leave from them with a bad taste in their mouth.

So, I guess the moral of this blog post is: be more like Chick-fil-A and less like Popeyes.

Okay, maybe I do need to be committed to a mental institution.  SMH.

Monday, February 1, 2021

Men Judge Your Social Media

Okay, so we've seen countless ladies post memes that say things like, "the memes I post on Facebook are strictly for entertainment. And if you don't believe it, then that's on you." And they expect you to ignore the thirst trap photos, drama-filled rants, and posts about them claiming that they're single. 

The truth is: men judge women by their Facebook post, regardless if ladies thinks that is fair, accurate or not, we just do. 

And as a man, I don't want the trouble that comes along with someone who is beefing on Facebook with people or someone who posts cryptic updates just to try to get some type of reaction or response. And don't get me started on a thirst trap photos. I mean, those same women will complain about guys in their inbox. I mean, come on now. Are you serious? If you put honey on the kitchen counter, then expect to get ants. That's just how that works. 

Inspirational quotes in the morning and thirst trap photos at night will definitely get you attention. But from whom? But hey, I'm not an expert. I just have an opinion. So let me share the opinion of another and get his two cents. 

He's the host of the Hard Parking Podcast: society and culture first, the car stuff comes second. It's essentially a non-automotive automotive podcast. It's a dope show that I enjoy. And it can be found on Anchor, Apple podcasts or just about anywhere podcasts are found. From the Grand Canyon State of Arizona, ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Jhae Pfenning

Jhae, let the people know your two cents on women in our Facebook posts. 

"I don't know man, I think it's difficult in 2020. Because the landscape is so different than when I was growing up. I think now, if ever it's more acceptable, but I don't think they're gonna attract a guy who seriously wants to date him. I think about this, because because I can't even imagine life as a woman on social media. You don't have even have to look good in do to slide in your DM. I can't imagine what some of these girls are doing. Are they doing it to themselves? Yes. 

But I think about, I used to be a bouncer. And one of the things as a bouncer is, it's so difficult. So if a girl comes in, she's hanging out with her friends. And you're like, 'man, there's something about her, I want to know who she is, I want to know her more. She's kind of quiet sticking to herself. Sticking to her friends. She's not out there dancing or whatever, not acting a fool most of the time.' 

Even if they allow you to talk to them. They're not going to give you the time of day, if you ask them out, they're not going to take you serious because the stigma is, since you work at the club, and you a bouncer, you're asking every girl every night, the same thing. You're taking girls home all the time. And I can just say for me, that was never the case. I know there's some people out there telling these stories, and this happened to them. For me, that was never the case. 

And so if a girl is putting herself out there on social media, doing all these quotes, these inspirational quotes, these motivational quotes. 'I just need a guy', 'I don't want a guy's gonna lie to me', you know, all that kind of shit. 'Find a guy who's going to be truthful for you and make him your king', girls who do that. 

Then they posted these extremely sexualized photos of themselves and they know what they're doing. And then they're like, 'I need a man'. No one's gonna take him serious. Because the stigma is, you're just doing it for attention. You can't crowd-source a relationship. That's what dating apps are for. 

So 'no', no one's gonna take him serious. It'll be rare. The really good guy that they really want to get is not gonna take him serious."

You heard the homie, Jhae. The guy that you want. That man? He won't take you seriously. You'll get the attention of "guys", but guys are a dime a dozen and they're in it just for a good time and that alone time. 

If you want a "man", then whether you like or don't like what Jhae and I are saying, you may want to pay attention to what you post on social media, because men are judging you by it. Fair or not, it's reality.

Sunday, January 24, 2021

What Is "A Good Woman"?

One of my FB friends posted something today that asked all men to describe a "good woman" and all women to describe a "good man".  

Of course, guys started talking about good sex, cooking, swag, yadda, yadda, yadda.  It definitely reinforced why some guys make horrible decisions when choosing a mate.  

The superficial things that we may crave as men have nothing to do with her being a "good woman".  Her ability to cook, clean, or do whatever domestic chores that we traditional men tend to enjoy means nothing either.

A "good woman" is someone a man is proud of each time he enters the room with her.  Not for what she may bring to the table in looks and style, but for what her presence does.  She has an aura of royalty and regalness about her.

Here is my response to the post on Facebook on what I think a "good woman" is:

Someone who pours her heart into everything that she does. People admire her and want to be like her. She makes people around her better in some way. Her name brings about a sense of pride and not shame in any way. She would be respected by the lowest of the low as well as the highest of the high. Being a good woman has absolutely nothing to do with a man, but everything to do with herself.

In my opinion, being a "good woman" has absolutely nothing to do with what she can do for me as a man.  It has everything to do with her reputation being worthy of respect.  

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