Tweeting with Q
I've been hanging on to this story for a while. Almost two months ago, I went to the doctor for a check up and got into a staring contest with a guy wearing a rebel flag cap. He was in the waiting room with his son who appeared to be mid-20's and unable to fill out his paperwork without assistance.
For those who are new to my blog, I am a black guy. That's important as I tell my story. So, rebel flag guy stares at me as if he wanted to dissect me with his eyes. I stare back until I realize that he's way too ugly to stare at so long. Out of the restroom walks a very attractive blonde. She was around 5'4" with an athletic build. She was like a miniature version of Laura Prepron. She sits next to me and the fun begins...
"Hi, how are you? My name is Quincy!" I say emphatically.
"Hi, I'm Becky and that's not much of a pick-up line," she replied with a smile and while extending her hand for a shake.
I started thinking to myself, "Okay, cool. She's friendly. This should be fun."
"Ooh," she starts,"I have a cell phone just like yours, Quincy!"
I now have the full attention of Mr. Rebel Flag. Although he's too far away (12-15 feet) to hear our conversation, he can see that Becky and I are enjoying each other's company. As I'm tweeting, Becky grabs my hand to get a better look at my phone and notices than I'm on Twitter. I look up and sure enough, RF Guy doesn't look happy that she's touching me.
She laughs at my tweet and then looks up and notices RF Guy turning redder by the minute. I look up at him with a huge smirk and then back at her. "What's wrong with him?" she whispers.
"I don't think he likes the idea of you talking to me," I reply.
Becky realizes that she's part of a show and decides to play along. She takes my phone from my hand and starts typing.
She gives me back the phone and flashes a huge smile. "Thank you," I started, "you just started the ball rolling on the sequel to "A Time to Kill."
"I'm sorry," she said erupting in laughter,"I couldn't resist after I realized what was going on."
By now, this guy is mumbling to himself and his son is looking over at us trying to figure out what's going on. RF Guy is still staring at Becky and I to the point that I'm starting to feel uncomfortable. She seems to be getting a kick out of it and she asks me about what I do for a living to continue the conversation. Before I can answer, the nurse calls her name to go to the back to see the doctor. "It was very nice to meet you," she starts, "You're funny."
"No, I should be thanking you for that Oscar-winning performance," I said quietly.
She smiled, glanced at RF Guy and then disappeared behind the double doors. I look back over at RF Guy and he looks like a lobster. I can't believe this guy is so upset. Does he hate black people so badly that a conversation with a white woman blows his lid?
A few minutes later, the nurse calls my name. I don't even look the direction of RF Guy and his son as I make my way to the back. Hopefully, I won't need a police escort to get to my car in the parking lot once I'm done. I'd hate to get outside and find RF Guy and six of his friends standing next to my car. After all, this is Mississippi.
I come out of the doctor's office and look around the waiting room. No RF Guy. I walk to my car smiling to myself thinking about everything that happened. I probably ruined that racist's day. I can't wait to get back to work and tell someone how I pissed off a white man. How people let other people's business affect their lives is beyond me.
You know I got fussed at the other day from a friend 10 yrs my junior. She called me a racist. After a long conversation it occurred to me that when growing up my interactions with black people were not positive. Due to the type of company my father owned, one of the local prisons would ask him to hire parolees. So my whole life the men that worked around my fathers business were not a positive impression of black society.
ReplyDeleteI am now in my late 30's and while I have black friends it is hard to overcome my overall impression, but I have to be honest television doesn't help the cause any.
I am also a civil war re-enactor, but I know the original purpose of the civil war was states rights. I am so tired of the northern spin on their win that it was totally about slavery. The emancipation proclamation was almost 18 months into the war.
I love the stars and bars, but for what it means to me, not for what so much of history has told people it means!
SD, all I can say is that it is hard not to generalize sometimes, but that's with any race. A lot of black people assume that the average white person they meet is either racist or clueless on what goes on outside of their community. It's definitely not fair and I advocate against that way of thinking, but that's just how society is in the U.S.. We're taught how to separate from those who are different from us rather than embrace them. Black/white, rich/poor, straight/gay, men/women, Democrat/Republican, Christian/Muslim. I could go on and on.
DeleteAs for the flag, I don't think that it was viewed as a symbol of hate because of the Civil War, but because of the Ku Klux Klan. The two became associated with one another and just seem to stick. Although the average person probably does think the Civil War was about slavery, if you ask them about the flag, they'll say "KKK."
Personally, the rebel flag doesn't bother me. It represents the history of this state, both good and bad. But, like a swastika, some people assume "Nazi" when they see it despite its true meaning and historic value.
That is interesting that you say the KKK I never even associate it with that society. I have serious problems with the philosophies of the KKK, and think that behavior to be uneducated. However I never realized that black society associated the flag of the confederate states with the KKK.
DeleteSee even us white folks can be blind sometimes. I do have one question, and this is a personal conundrum. Why do black people refer to themselves as African Americans even if they were born in the states? I know people that their families have lived in the states for a century and they still consider themselves African American. Why would you separate yourselves from American society by adding the other country? I know that ancestors may have come from Africa, but as a society don't we need to stop the separation behaviors and work to embrace the differences of Americans in general?
Yeah, I've heard tons of stories of that flag terrorizing people in the South with the rebel flag blowing in the wind. I think it's perpetuated by movies as well.
DeleteI agree with you on the African-American thing. I don't do that. If anyone has to know my race, I'll say black, but I won't refer to my nationality as African-American. Besides, if Africa is the Motherland for everyone, then everybody here is African-American.
I thoroughly enjoyed this story, Q!
ReplyDeleteThank you, SS! I got a kick out of it and I'm glad that I started tweeting to document it. People need to grow up and just accept the fact that things have changed. Regardless if a person feels a certain way or not, control your household and stop worrying about everyone else's.
DeleteWe all do at least one thing that someone some where wouldn't like.
This is fantastic. If you're that easily preyed-upon, you deserve to be mocked and poked fun of as much as possible.
ReplyDeleteThat is, unless you have a developmental disorder. But luckily 'stoopid' doesn't count.
I bet that was the last time he went to that doctor's office! Hahaha!
It is amazing how people can let something like that bother them. If it were his daughter, then I'd understand his concern. And what was staring and changing colors going to do anyway? I would have had more respect for him had he come over and spoke to me about it rather than stare.
DeleteIf you are that quick to get upset then you deserve to be fucked with. I am lucky that when I was dating black guys I never had to deal with any negatives...or I just had blinders on and never saw it. I get a bit of a kick out of getting to small minded people so I don't blame you at all for egging the guy on. haha.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I got a kick out of it until he and his son, Slingblade, started looking at me a little too hard. People are crazy these days, so you can only take things so far.
DeleteLOL glad you played with him - what a complete dick though that guy must be. x
ReplyDeleteYeah, he needs a hug very badly. I hope it didn't make it worse for the next minority he encounters. :)
DeleteWow, you made out pretty good by coming into contact with someone willing to play along. But it was a (potentially) dangerous game!
ReplyDeleteIt was in hindsight. But, I did think it was cool that she caught on and decided to help me out. It kind of just goes to show how stupid his actions were.
DeleteThat's hilarious, yet disturbing at the same time. Can't believe that such racism still exists.
ReplyDeleteI know, right? It's a shame, but it's alive and well. Just as not as upfront as it used to be.
DeleteQ, I've got a brother-in-law who grew up in Clinton, Tennessee in the 1950's, at a time when that high school was the first in east TN to integrate. I had always wondered why he had such a blind spot when it came to blatant racist attitudes and comments when in every other regard the guy was a great person. So I did a little digging and discovered that the state's Natty Guard had to be called into his hometown and high school to make sure the locals didn't slaughter one another. Apparently, the entire episode scarred him for life, because he still harbors those 1950's attitudes. He hides them better than he did forty years ago when my sister brought him home to meet the family, but they're still there.
ReplyDeleteDude can't watch a football game on tv without making some comment about the "high speed rear end" of the receiver who outran the white kid to the endzone. Every commercial is an opportunity to pontificate about race and culture, always with a sneer and a nod. It got so bad that I stopped taking my kids to visit my sister's house other than on holidays because I didn't want them exposed to those attitudes and comments more than necessary.
I can assure you, had he been in the doctor's office with RF hat guy he would have been just as pissed, although better at hiding his emotions than the guy you toyed with.
It's friggin' sad. What year is this again??? Is Strom Thurmond still running the Senate? George Wallace still standing in the door of the U of A?
The truly sad part is knowing this kind of shit won't die out anytime soon, either. That guy's kid is probably as screwed up as he is. Just watch current politics to see how racism taints every debate and discussion. We're not much more enlightened than we were when the National Guard was on patrol in Clinton, Tn.
Sad story, Squat. Some people are just stuck in time. If he would have had a conversation with me, he may have discovered that all of us aren't necessarily as bad as he thinks. Sure, I didn't do anything to help with race relations while messing with him, but I wasn't in the state of mind to "reach out."
DeleteWhy is it so hard to coexist? Even if you don't know/understand a minority, do you have to treat all of them like dirt? I just don't get it.
Pretty funny Q. I can't say I see that here in California, because people here tend to be "under cover" with that kind of stuff. They aren't as bold as it might be in the south, but that was pretty funny. I liked how you included your tweets in this post as it was all happening. The funny part is that he wanted you to know how he felt and you gave it right back without him even knowing. That was genius.
ReplyDelete(takes a bow) Thank you so much. Yeah, it can be blatant around here still. However, it's generally few and far between. It's been a while since I've noticed anything like that, but it does still exist. I'm glad it's not as common out there. I guess they're sneakier about it. :)
DeleteThis may be a late comment, but I would just like to put in my two cents. I am in no way shape or form a racist. If I think you don't get along with me, I dislike you, be you white, black, or anything else.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I do take immense pride in the rebel flag. To me it is a symbol of independence and defiance of a government that a group of people disagree with. We should keep in mind, the civil war did not start because of slavery, but because of restrictions the US government put on the southern States.
This strikes home ever more clear in today's world, where the government continues to infringe upon our constitutional rights, and seeks to oppress us for their own personal gain. Today more than ever I feel a sense of loyalty to the rebel flag, not out of any prejudice or racism, but because I stand against the tyranny of an oppressive regime and hope for the days when power once again rests in the hands of the people for whom government serves. Peace to you all, both black and white, you are my brother and sister Americans.
Hey, it's never too late to comment! :)
DeleteAs a black man, I absolutely don't have a problem with the flag either. A lot of people do want to make the Civil War about slavery when it was so much more to it. The problem is: too many incidents like the above occur and people tend to associate the flag with racism. I know of black guys who refused to play football at Ole Miss because the flag intimidated them.
So, I have no problem whatsoever for you to feel "Southern Pride." It's your God-given right to do so and no one should try and take that away from you. I only wish that everyone could understand that just because a white person wears a rebel flag doesn't mean they're a racist any more than a black guy with a hoodie is a gangster. Some people wear certain clothing simply because they like them, not because they're making a stand of some sort.
Thanks for your great comment!