Friday, September 16, 2011

Mommy, Look At The Penguins!

This post first appeared as a guest post on

"Mommy, look at the penguins!" is what I would imagine hearing from a child who is visiting the United States for the first time. This imaginary child from a foreign land would not be referring to the frigid birds of the tundra, but instead... idiots and their sagging pants.

My mom and / or dad would have stapled my pants up to my nipples before they let me walk around sagging like a convict. Yes, I said convict. After all, that's where the trend allegedly got its start.

Prisoners were forbidden to wear belts in jail because some of them would use the belt to hang themselves. As a result of being beltless, the pants they wore tended to sag. This made it more difficult to commit suicide and it also made it more difficult to run when trying to escape custody. It was also stated that the men wearing their pants "extra low" were some other prisoner's "hoe." Some how in the 90's, this prison trend crept its way into hip hop culture and has now infected our kids. I'm guessing because they're too stupid to research the origin of things.

Now, let me state this first: I have no problem with kids having trends. I participated in some trends as a youth and I understand how cool it looks when you're young. That's why you have to be a certain age to drink because youngsters are naturally stupid and can't tell "cool" from "fool" very easily. What I don't understand is how something so flat-out laughable has become cool. People used to moon other people as a joke, but now it's a fashion trend to see someone's butt. No longer do you have to go to a strip club or call a plumber in order to see a butt crack.

Can anyone under 25 years old explain to me how pulling up your pants every three steps and walking like a penguin is cool?

If you were a prisoner, wouldn't this be more of an invitation that a fashion statement?


  1. I will never understand this "fashion." I do think this is a possible solution though:

  2. @ Lawfrog - LOL @ that link! That would break a child from doing anything wrong! :)

  3. The only reason I let my pants sag is because they're really shorts. I want to cover my legs, so I just let my ass hang out.

  4. @ LiI - LOL! Maybe that's how it all actually started.

  5. Ah a topic close to my heart! I wrote a post about this awful pant sagging, rump showing trend.

  6. @ Alice - It appears to be an epidemic, eh? LOL!

  7. Yo. What I find even MORE alarming is when GROWN ASS MEN who are OVER 25 wear their pants sagging.
    A: Grow the hell up.
    B: You look even MORE foolish than the juveniles who are doing it, and you have NO EXCUSE.
    C: See A & B

  8. @ Reck - You're right. I absolutely don't understand why someone that old would do this. I've seen people in their 30's trying to sag and it's pathetic.

  9. My brother does this stupid crap and I tell him all the time how silly he looks, but I agree it's some stupid trend that I hope goes away fast like spandex! This trend is not appealing and if any man thinks this shit is sexy is drunk and stupid.

    Some women might like this, but if you have to keep pulling it up, then why wear them down? Or better yet, why not just take them off and walk around in your underwear already! Decide? Underwear or Pants...

  10. @ LogAllot - LOL! Don't give them any ideas! I don't want to see any more boxer shorts than I do already!


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