Sunday, August 29, 2010

Ugly... Ugly... Cute... Cute...

So, I'm taking an extremely rare trip to the mall the other day to buy a pair of dress pants for an event. I despise the mall, so it takes a special occasion for me to make one of my semi-annual trips.

I open the door leading into JCPenney and before I know it... "Ugly... Ugly... Cute... Cute..."

I'm passing judgement on the women I see. It didn't occur to me until after the fourth or fifth woman that I was even doing so. I almost came to a complete stop as I thought to myself, "Has my life been this way since puberty? Do I judge every strange woman I encounter for her physical appearance?"

Yep. I judge attractiveness in strange women. I don't tend to react that way when I meet people, but if you are a stranger just walking by, you've been labeled. For some reason, when I meet people I am actually focused on the person, their name and something distinctive about their speech. I think the way a woman talks, for lack of a better word, "speaks" volumes about her level of intelligence.

But if you're just walking by and the only focus of mine is on you and what you're wearing, then I'm going to harvest a mental opinion of your appearance never to be shared with anyone.

Am I the only person who does this? Surely I'm not. Everyone whose attention is drawn by another person, for better or worse, judges them as "ugly", "cute" or somewhere in between, right?

Even as a married man, I still recognize "unattractive" from "attractive". I guess people think once you're married that sense dies at the altar or something.

Negative, negative.

That sense never dies. I'll be a 91-year old man passing beauty judgments on women. If you look like a fruit bat, then I'll label you as such. If you're magazine-cover ready, then I'll label you as such.

Even The Mrs. knows that I have an opinion on everyone I notice. Every now and then she'll ask if I think someone is cute or not. Some times it catches me off-guard, but I'm honest with her in my answer.

So, now that this has been brought to your attention, you're going to realize that you do this, too, right? I think some people do it without knowing. I don't think there's anything wrong with it because you're not telling the person they're ugly. Besides, don't ugly people know that they're ugly?

Okay, that seemed mean, but if I realize that I'm overweight, why can't they realize they're ugly? And if you're comfortable with you, then who cares what anyone thinks?

So, with that in mind, the next time you're in public and someone happens to catch your eye, what will you think?

"Ugly" or "cute"?


  1. NOT GONNA LIE...I DO THIS A LOT!!! BUT IT'S NOT 'UGLY' OR 'CUTE'...I play a different game...BIG DICK, LITTLE DICK! My gal pals and I used to do this when we would go places together and giggle till we would almost pass out! We'd gather a combination of things we would see in men that would pass by ranging from hight to size of hands and make ridiculous guesses! :D

  2. I do this all the time. And frankly, I've been doing it for as long as I can remember. It's almost like it's engrained into our psyches.

    I tend to feel bad after labeling women, but I'm pretty sure that the oppossite sex does the same. Of course there are always exceptions for both genders.

  3. It's nice to know that I'm not alone in this, Alex! I figured more people did, I just wasn't sure how many would admit it. I think that it's something that we do without realizing it every time we're in public.

  4. We all are a bastard human race we can sometimes make ourselves better looking or prettier but all said and done we are who we are that's what we were born like and who cares what we look like on the outside as long as we all try to be beautiful on the inside WHY JUDGE----WE SHOULD ALL TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT OURSELVES----

    1. I agree. Judgments shouldn't be made because outside beauty is subjective.


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