Showing posts with label sex tapes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex tapes. Show all posts
Monday, April 14, 2014
Monday, November 7, 2011
Girls Gone White
I'm up late watching HDNet which is one of my favorite channels. After watching a very entertaining episode of "Art Mann Presents," I go to the kitchen to get some water only to return to the start of "Girls Gone Wild: Unrated."
That show is absolutely nuts.
It's amazing how just a production name and a camera can bring out the most unpredictable behavior in a person. I could go into a bar in Jackson with a GGW t-shirt on, a microphone and someone carrying a camera and literally wind up with a group of topless women in a hotel room licking on each other. God bless America, right?
For those of you who have not seen this phenomenon, let me break down a typical show segment for you:
Guy shows up at beach with a microphone and a camera man. Women immediately start to turn towards the camera, pull up their bikini tops and scream "whooooooooo!!!!!!" The guy then selects five girls to go to his limo where he then instructs three of them to do a three-way tongue kiss for the camera. After that, he asks that each of them turn around and show their butt before reminding them that they can no longer wear their tops in the limo. After the ride back to the GGW bus, the ladies get on board and commence to doing each other on a bed.
This is pretty much the entire show. I know what you're asking yourself, "What do the girls get in return for showing their breasts and butts to the world via HDTV and Web?"
A GGW t-shirt and booty shorts! Well, that's all worth it then, right?
But, after about 15-20 minutes, I started noticing that something was missing while I was composing this blog post with this show playing in the background. I started to notice that it was basically a loop of similar-looking girls with pierced nipples in every other shot. Nothing exotic. Nothing uncommon. Just everyday mall rats who were looking for their 15 minutes of fame by any means necessary. Then it hit me:
In the words of Bizarro Sheriff Bart from 'Blazing Saddles,' "Where all the black women at?" That's right. 30 minutes without a site of one sista. Not even a chica or a pinay. Just Girls Gone White.
Then again, I do understand that it's not necessarily a race thing. It's a money thing. That's what sells. Who pays to see naked and white party girls? White guys. Do you know who else pays to see naked and white party girls? Every other race of guys. So, you can't lose right? Let's be honest, I would guess (I don't know for sure) that more non-white guys would buy a GGW Blu Ray quicker than white guys would buy a Black GGW Blu Ray.
You have to cater to the market, right? And white women are universal like Type-O blood. I know some sistas may wrinkle their foreheads reading this, but I didn't make the rules or set the standards. Society did long before I walked this earth. White women are the only race of women who can have their sex appeal marketed in any part of the world because they are stereotyped to be more fun than other races.
Is that true? I don't know. I've never dated a white woman before. I've had plenty of friends (no benefits), classmates and co-workers who were white, but their personalities weren't too much different than any black women I knew. Somewhat less guarded and more outgoing than some black women? Maybe. Then again, I didn't hang around too many party types on a regular basis. I have a (black) homie of mine who has dated mostly whites in his life. I've heard him refer to them as "easy-going," "open" and "adventurous." Is he accurate? I haven't a clue, but I do know that none of the women in the show appeared to have any regrets for what they were doing. Half of them didn't even appear to be drunk. They all seemed like a group of girls who just wanted to have a good time and be able to say they were "a Girl Gone Wild."
Well, personally, it's not a big deal to me. I realize that it's easier to find a water-skiing squirrel on YouTube than it is to find a black woman on an after-hours premium channel. I don't think it means that white women are all "party girls" or sexier any more than black women are.
I just think it means that they sell more Blu Rays/DVD's. Type-O.
.
That show is absolutely nuts.
It's amazing how just a production name and a camera can bring out the most unpredictable behavior in a person. I could go into a bar in Jackson with a GGW t-shirt on, a microphone and someone carrying a camera and literally wind up with a group of topless women in a hotel room licking on each other. God bless America, right?
For those of you who have not seen this phenomenon, let me break down a typical show segment for you:
Guy shows up at beach with a microphone and a camera man. Women immediately start to turn towards the camera, pull up their bikini tops and scream "whooooooooo!!!!!!" The guy then selects five girls to go to his limo where he then instructs three of them to do a three-way tongue kiss for the camera. After that, he asks that each of them turn around and show their butt before reminding them that they can no longer wear their tops in the limo. After the ride back to the GGW bus, the ladies get on board and commence to doing each other on a bed.
This is pretty much the entire show. I know what you're asking yourself, "What do the girls get in return for showing their breasts and butts to the world via HDTV and Web?"
A GGW t-shirt and booty shorts! Well, that's all worth it then, right?
But, after about 15-20 minutes, I started noticing that something was missing while I was composing this blog post with this show playing in the background. I started to notice that it was basically a loop of similar-looking girls with pierced nipples in every other shot. Nothing exotic. Nothing uncommon. Just everyday mall rats who were looking for their 15 minutes of fame by any means necessary. Then it hit me:
In the words of Bizarro Sheriff Bart from 'Blazing Saddles,' "Where all the black women at?" That's right. 30 minutes without a site of one sista. Not even a chica or a pinay. Just Girls Gone White.
Then again, I do understand that it's not necessarily a race thing. It's a money thing. That's what sells. Who pays to see naked and white party girls? White guys. Do you know who else pays to see naked and white party girls? Every other race of guys. So, you can't lose right? Let's be honest, I would guess (I don't know for sure) that more non-white guys would buy a GGW Blu Ray quicker than white guys would buy a Black GGW Blu Ray.
You have to cater to the market, right? And white women are universal like Type-O blood. I know some sistas may wrinkle their foreheads reading this, but I didn't make the rules or set the standards. Society did long before I walked this earth. White women are the only race of women who can have their sex appeal marketed in any part of the world because they are stereotyped to be more fun than other races.
Is that true? I don't know. I've never dated a white woman before. I've had plenty of friends (no benefits), classmates and co-workers who were white, but their personalities weren't too much different than any black women I knew. Somewhat less guarded and more outgoing than some black women? Maybe. Then again, I didn't hang around too many party types on a regular basis. I have a (black) homie of mine who has dated mostly whites in his life. I've heard him refer to them as "easy-going," "open" and "adventurous." Is he accurate? I haven't a clue, but I do know that none of the women in the show appeared to have any regrets for what they were doing. Half of them didn't even appear to be drunk. They all seemed like a group of girls who just wanted to have a good time and be able to say they were "a Girl Gone Wild."
Well, personally, it's not a big deal to me. I realize that it's easier to find a water-skiing squirrel on YouTube than it is to find a black woman on an after-hours premium channel. I don't think it means that white women are all "party girls" or sexier any more than black women are.
I just think it means that they sell more Blu Rays/DVD's. Type-O.
.
Monday, December 6, 2010
How to Get Famous 301
In 2010, it is not about if you're talented or not. It's all about if you are memorable.
Society has set the stage for us to find our way onto someone's flat screen! Will you do something so mind-numbingly stupid that people will remember you and want to see more of you?
How to Get Famous 301 starts now!
Reality show contestant
Gotta love reality TV. Mindless, manufactured drama which costs the broadcasters very little and doesn't require its viewers to do much thinking.
These people recognize their opportunities. They know that if they can act a big enough fool, that they will get their 15 minutes of fame and maybe even more.
Now, there's nothing "real" about a reality show. When's the last time you went to someone's house and they had 15 people living in it of different gender, race and/or sexual orientation? Mix in nightly trips to the bar with people of the opposite (or sometimes same) sex coming on to you with alcohol-induced flirting and you have instant drama! When you put people in that type of living arrangement, then something is bound to pop off.
That link is one of my favorite funny reality show clips, by the way. Anyhoo, I look at reality shows as a newer, sexier version of daytime soap operas. I remember being at work, a decade ago, and listening to women in the break room discussing "Y&R" or "All My Children". Now, when I enter the break room, it's all about Snooki (what's a "Snooki" anyway?), Nene or whoever. Snooki makes $30k per episode for being obnoxious and a drunk. Some of my readers probably do the same for free. LOL! Stop short-changing yourself! Get paid for those drunken rants you end up blogging about weekly! :)
There have been some talented and successful reality show contestants: Elizabeth Hasselbeck turned "Survivor" into a spot on "The View". Kelly Clarkson used "American Idol" to springboard into a successful music career. Kim Kardashian turned "ho-dom" into "stardom" (I'm sorry, but if you create and release a sex tape of yourself, you're a ho).
So, anyone can grace the cover of multiple magazines or home pages of websites. All you have to do is simply this:
a) Get a spot on a show .
b) Act the biggest donkey known to mankind.
Even a moron could do it! You could be the next big thing!
And when you do, don't forget to give me a shout for helping you learn how to get famous!
Society has set the stage for us to find our way onto someone's flat screen! Will you do something so mind-numbingly stupid that people will remember you and want to see more of you?
How to Get Famous 301 starts now!
Reality show contestant
Gotta love reality TV. Mindless, manufactured drama which costs the broadcasters very little and doesn't require its viewers to do much thinking.
These people recognize their opportunities. They know that if they can act a big enough fool, that they will get their 15 minutes of fame and maybe even more.
Now, there's nothing "real" about a reality show. When's the last time you went to someone's house and they had 15 people living in it of different gender, race and/or sexual orientation? Mix in nightly trips to the bar with people of the opposite (or sometimes same) sex coming on to you with alcohol-induced flirting and you have instant drama! When you put people in that type of living arrangement, then something is bound to pop off.
That link is one of my favorite funny reality show clips, by the way. Anyhoo, I look at reality shows as a newer, sexier version of daytime soap operas. I remember being at work, a decade ago, and listening to women in the break room discussing "Y&R" or "All My Children". Now, when I enter the break room, it's all about Snooki (what's a "Snooki" anyway?), Nene or whoever. Snooki makes $30k per episode for being obnoxious and a drunk. Some of my readers probably do the same for free. LOL! Stop short-changing yourself! Get paid for those drunken rants you end up blogging about weekly! :)
There have been some talented and successful reality show contestants: Elizabeth Hasselbeck turned "Survivor" into a spot on "The View". Kelly Clarkson used "American Idol" to springboard into a successful music career. Kim Kardashian turned "ho-dom" into "stardom" (I'm sorry, but if you create and release a sex tape of yourself, you're a ho).
So, anyone can grace the cover of multiple magazines or home pages of websites. All you have to do is simply this:
a) Get a spot on a show .
b) Act the biggest donkey known to mankind.
Even a moron could do it! You could be the next big thing!
And when you do, don't forget to give me a shout for helping you learn how to get famous!
Friday, October 15, 2010
How To Get Famous 101
A few decades ago, it took talent to get on TV. Not only did you have to have acting skills in the days of Sammy Davis, Jr., Elvis or Fred Astaire in order to get on TV, but you also had to know how to sing and dance, too. Everyone on TV was the "complete package" when it came to truly being famous. That meant years and years (for some) of doing stand-up comedy in night clubs, or singing in bars or going on the road and performing in plays.
In 2010, it is not about if you're talented or not. It's all about if you are memorable . I don't know who won last season's "American Idol", but I remember the "Pants on the Ground" guy, Larry Platt.
Society has set the stage for us to find our way onto someone's flat screen! Will you do something so mind-numbingly stupid that people will remember you and want to see more of you?
How to Get Famous 101 starts now!
Sex Tape/Scandal
Monica Lewinsky, Paris Hilton, Ray J, Kim Kardashian are a few names that immediately come to mind when I mention sex tapes and scandals. Each of them were either the furthest thing from my mind or completely unknown to me before their tape/scandals put them on the map.
I had absolutely no idea who Kim Kardashian was before her sex tape. Aside from the fame generated from the sex tape, I really don't know what her accomplishments are in life. For that matter, the co-star of her tape, Ray J, was an extremely small-time R&B singer before the release of the flick. I simply knew him as "Brandy's brother" prior to its release.
Now, he is going into his 3rd season of his reality show "For The Love of Ray J". A show where actresses, er, uh, I mean contestants try to win his affection through whoreish tactics, er, uh... Scratch that. I mean, by spending quality time with him.
Kim K. is going into her 5th season of "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" which is about a family of losers spending their dead dad's money. And while I'm on the topic of Kim, if I hear one more white guy comment on her butt, I'm going to blow a gasket!
Black women have had booty for centuries and they have gone unnoticed. Now I have to hear my white friends go on and on about Kim's butt?
I'm going to give it to you straight because I'm a Life Referee: I can go to my local historically black university and see 25 Kim Kardashian booties from the time I park my car until the time I walk to the first dormitory. If you don't believe me, then you better ask someone. It's not to hate on Kim's shape because it's the one thing I've seen evidence of that she does well. Well, maybe one of two things. So, it's not her at all, but it is about the guys I deal with regularly who act like Kim and J-Lo invented round butts. Fail!
If Kim were black, she would be another curvy shape and not some "wide hips revolution". It may sound harsh, but it's true. Not to turn off any of my readers, but my blogs are real and I call it like I see it. Sorry about the tirade. My blogs are simply my thoughts put on-screen. What comes up, comes out.
Back to sex tapes/scandals. Monica Lewinsky turned her romps with Bubba Clinton into a TV show and a book deal. Only in America can a person turn from a ho to a household name.
Paris Hilton was the first person who I ever heard referred to as a "socialite". Dictionary.com says that a socialite is "a socially prominent person". My translation of that is "a person who shows up at parties and tries to get on camera every chance they can". Speaking of cameras, how can someone take a million different photos and have the same expression in each one of them?
When she released "One Night in Paris", she became an internet Google search sensation virtually overnight. She helped paved the way for many shameless people who "leak" sex tapes to get, for lack of a better word, exposure. Although Pam Anderson was the first one I remember, it was Paris who did it during the Digital Age which skyrocketed her popularity. Sorry, Pam. I hope "Dancing With The Stars" worked out for you.
Next topic: YouTube
In 2010, it is not about if you're talented or not. It's all about if you are memorable . I don't know who won last season's "American Idol", but I remember the "Pants on the Ground" guy, Larry Platt.
Society has set the stage for us to find our way onto someone's flat screen! Will you do something so mind-numbingly stupid that people will remember you and want to see more of you?
How to Get Famous 101 starts now!
Sex Tape/Scandal
Monica Lewinsky, Paris Hilton, Ray J, Kim Kardashian are a few names that immediately come to mind when I mention sex tapes and scandals. Each of them were either the furthest thing from my mind or completely unknown to me before their tape/scandals put them on the map.
I had absolutely no idea who Kim Kardashian was before her sex tape. Aside from the fame generated from the sex tape, I really don't know what her accomplishments are in life. For that matter, the co-star of her tape, Ray J, was an extremely small-time R&B singer before the release of the flick. I simply knew him as "Brandy's brother" prior to its release.
Now, he is going into his 3rd season of his reality show "For The Love of Ray J". A show where actresses, er, uh, I mean contestants try to win his affection through whoreish tactics, er, uh... Scratch that. I mean, by spending quality time with him.
Kim K. is going into her 5th season of "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" which is about a family of losers spending their dead dad's money. And while I'm on the topic of Kim, if I hear one more white guy comment on her butt, I'm going to blow a gasket!
Black women have had booty for centuries and they have gone unnoticed. Now I have to hear my white friends go on and on about Kim's butt?
I'm going to give it to you straight because I'm a Life Referee: I can go to my local historically black university and see 25 Kim Kardashian booties from the time I park my car until the time I walk to the first dormitory. If you don't believe me, then you better ask someone. It's not to hate on Kim's shape because it's the one thing I've seen evidence of that she does well. Well, maybe one of two things. So, it's not her at all, but it is about the guys I deal with regularly who act like Kim and J-Lo invented round butts. Fail!
If Kim were black, she would be another curvy shape and not some "wide hips revolution". It may sound harsh, but it's true. Not to turn off any of my readers, but my blogs are real and I call it like I see it. Sorry about the tirade. My blogs are simply my thoughts put on-screen. What comes up, comes out.
Back to sex tapes/scandals. Monica Lewinsky turned her romps with Bubba Clinton into a TV show and a book deal. Only in America can a person turn from a ho to a household name.
Paris Hilton was the first person who I ever heard referred to as a "socialite". Dictionary.com says that a socialite is "a socially prominent person". My translation of that is "a person who shows up at parties and tries to get on camera every chance they can". Speaking of cameras, how can someone take a million different photos and have the same expression in each one of them?
When she released "One Night in Paris", she became an internet Google search sensation virtually overnight. She helped paved the way for many shameless people who "leak" sex tapes to get, for lack of a better word, exposure. Although Pam Anderson was the first one I remember, it was Paris who did it during the Digital Age which skyrocketed her popularity. Sorry, Pam. I hope "Dancing With The Stars" worked out for you.
Next topic: YouTube
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