The Problem With Modern Parenting

Parenting in today’s world often looks very different from the past. Many parents think they’re setting their children up for success, but in reality, some modern parenting habits may be leaving kids unprepared for the challenges of adulthood. From over-scheduling to over-protecting, parents may be unintentionally stunting their children’s growth.

It’s common today to see parents doing almost everything for their kids. Instead of encouraging independence, many parents swoop in at the first sign of struggle. Children aren’t expected to problem-solve on their own, and as a result, they miss out on the confidence and resilience that come from overcoming obstacles. 

When I was growing up, I spent afternoons playing with neighbors, navigating social conflicts naturally. Now, most interactions happen in structured, adult-supervised environments—whether it’s sporting activities, music lessons, or whatever after-school program comes to mind. While these activities can be cool, they shouldn't replace the unstructured play that teaches kids how to negotiate, compromise, and build real friendships. "Arranged" friendships shouldn't be the only form of building camaraderie.

And what's even more tripped out is that many kids today have busier schedules than their parents. Between soccer, gymnastics, and band practice, children are shuffled from one activity to another. Instead of mastering one skill or learning the value of focus, they dabble in everything. For parents, this becomes a way to maintain control while still being able to say, “My kid is active.”

Chores, early mornings, and uncomfortable tasks are often avoided in modern households. Yet, these small challenges build discipline and responsibility. When children never face discomfort at home, they’re unprepared for the uncomfortable realities of adult life. Whether it’s waking up for a job, handling awkward social situations, or bouncing back from rejection.

Parents can’t sit in on job interviews (although many have) or make sure their kids get to work on time forever. When children grow up sheltered and dependent, they enter adulthood without the skills needed to navigate it. This often leads to entitlement, lack of accountability, and even parents stepping in well into their child’s adulthood.

And to top it off, a lot of parents are raising kids solo. So that makes it twice as hard to prepare your child for adulthood. 

Many parents embrace the mindset: “I’ll give my child everything I never had.” But maybe the better mindset is: “I’ll teach my child everything I was never taught.” Kids need discipline, independence, and real-world preparation—not just opportunities and material comforts.

Parenting with love and protection is important but so is preparing kids for life outside the home. The goal isn’t to raise a child who is merely “active” but to raise an adult who is capable, confident, and independent. 

Because, God forbid, if you die, then how would your child survive without you? A lioness doesn't feed her cub until its full-grown. It only does it until the cub is old enough to go hunting with her to learn. Birds don't feed their babies until they are full-grown. Some will even push their kids out of the safety of the nest to teach them to fly.

If the animals in the wild have it figured out, then why is it so hard for humans to grasp the concept of "preparation" over "pampering"? Stop trying to be a friend and be a parent. It's the job you signed up for.

I’ll Never Be the “Cool Old Guy” And It Sucks

I’m 53 years old, and it finally hit me... I’ll never be "cool" in the eyes of young people.

When I was growing up, things were different. Older people were respected, even admired. My uncles, my elders, and even the older guys down the street had a kind of authority. They carried wisdom, life experience, and a quiet confidence that made them role models in a way. To me, they weren’t “out of touch”. They were legends. OGs.

But somewhere along the way, that changed.

Today, the younger generation doesn’t look at people my age with respect or curiosity. Instead, they often dismiss us as outdated, irrelevant, or even annoying. We’re not mentors. We’re “has-beens.” And no matter how hard I try, I’ll never be the “cool old guy” that my ancestors were to me.

When I think about my childhood, I realize why my elders had so much respect. Back then it was harder to get knowledge. Outside of an encyclopedia or a library, you were stuck. If you wanted to learn something, you had to ask someone older or more experienced.

Back then tradition mattered. Culture and family history were passed down through stories, and elders were the keepers of those stories. Family stories rarely get passed down today as they did back then. And when you factor in so many blended families in society that we have now, it's even more rare to keep up with family history.

Back then patience was taught. Life wasn’t so fast-paced. People slowed down to listen and genuinely had interest in what you had to say most of the time. And even if they weren't interested, somehow what was being said still stuck somewhere in their mind to be retrieved later.

In short, older people had something that young people needed. Not anymore.

Fast forward to now, and everything has flipped. Information is everywhere. So much of it is probably not true, but verification isn't important in present-day America. With Google, TikTok, and YouTube, young people don’t feel they need to ask anyone for guidance.

Fast forward to now, and even the trends don't last long anymore. I thought my uncles were cool in their 70's clothing but fashion rarely lasts a decade now. By the time something catches on, the next wave has already started.

Fast forward to now and getting older isn't aspirational anymore. Instead of looking forward to maturity, youth culture glorifies staying young forever. To be fair, people my age tend to enjoy the youth culture a little too much as well. Maybe that's where some of the lack of respect comes from, huh? (Message!)

It hurts to admit, but I’ve noticed it in my own life. I walk into a room of young people, and instead of being seen as someone with stories to tell or lessons to share, I’m seen as outdated background noise.

The cruel irony is this: I really wanted to grow into one of those wise, cool elders I once admired. But the role doesn’t even exist anymore—not in the way it used to. I wanted to be the guy who pointed "finger guns" towards a guy and said, "watch out there now, young fella!"

Well, maybe not to that extreme, but you get my drift.

Still, maybe there’s another side to this. Maybe being “cool” to young people shouldn’t be the goal. Maybe it’s enough to pass down values, even if they don’t seem interested now. My goddaughter is 18 years old, and she listens to me still. We'll see how long that lasts. Her brother pretty much stopped at 20 years old, but I still think that he gets what I'm saying most of the time.

Maybe it’s about leading by example, showing resilience, patience, and grace. That's always easy, right? Just exist and keep doing what I've been doing, and it will be recognized.  I can always hope.

Maybe the respect comes later, when they’re older and finally understand. Only time will tell. Maybe I won't be too senile to recognize it if it does.

Because deep down, I know my uncles weren’t “cool” because they tried to impress anyone. They were cool because they were authentic, grounded, and unapologetically themselves. And that's all I ever strive to be. The best version of me that I can offer the world.

I'll never be the “cool old guy", and it sucks. But maybe coolness is overrated. What lasts longer than cool is character. And while they may not see it now, one day they might look back and recognize the value of the people they once brushed aside.

Until then, I’ll keep living my life with the quiet dignity my elders showed me. And who knows? Maybe one day, when the noise of youth fades, wisdom will matter again.

Government Shutdown: Why Are We the Ones Being Grounded?

Here we go again. The government can’t get its act together, and guess who ends up suffering? Not the senators. Not the congressmen or women. Not the people collecting checks for showing up to argue on the 24-hour news networks. Nope. 

It’s us. 

The taxpayers. The citizens. The people just trying to live our lives without needing a freaking PhD to understand why our government keeps wetting the bed when it comes to basic functionality.

We’re watching Democrats and Republicans lock horns again. And neither side wants to appear weak. Meanwhile, air traffic controllers, TSA agents, and other federal employees are being told to show up and work for free. FOR FREE!!!

Think about that for a second. The people responsible for keeping airplanes from crashing above our heads are clocking in without paychecks. Would you show up to your job every day, on time, and focused, if you weren’t getting paid? Didn’t think so.

Now, many are calling in sick and who can blame them? That’s not laziness. That’s human nature. The result? 

• Shortages and flight delays across the country. 
• Travelers are stranded. 
• Businesses are losing money. 
• Families are missing connections. 

All because the people we elected to represent us can’t manage to pass a budget without turning it into a political hostage situation. 

And here’s the part that really runs me hot: why is our system designed this way? Why do regular people get punished when politicians fail to do their jobs? If the government can’t function, then it should be their paychecks that stop first, not ours. Why should families go without? Why should essential workers suffer? All because Washington wants to play a game of “chicken” with the nation’s wellbeing?

Then there’s the issue of how they vote. Why are they packaging hundreds of bills together and voting on them as one giant lump sum? If a bill is good enough to stand on its own, then vote on it individually. But they don’t. Because lumping it all together gives both sides cover. They can say, “Well, I didn’t want to vote against [insert good policy], but it was attached to [insert bad policy].”

That’s not governance. That’s manipulation. 

And to think that we keep putting these same people in office simply because they have a "D" or an "R" by their names. That means we're part of the problem, too. We want our party to win even if it means that "we the people lose." SMH.

And finally, the question no one in Washington wants to ask: if the people we elect can’t find common ground, why don’t we get to break the tie? If Congress can’t decide, put it to the people. Let us vote on the key issues. If this is supposed to be a government “of the people, by the people, for the people,” then maybe it’s time we started acting like it.

Until then, we’ll just keep getting grounded—literally and figuratively—while they argue over who gets the window seat in first class.

I once saw a quote that said, "A system that punishes the people for its own incompetence isn’t broken—it’s built that way."

Truer words have never been said.

Thanks to my friend, Angela Marino of Texas, for inspiring this post. 

People Lie A Lot

Not all lies are based on scams and infidelity.  Some people lie because of their pride.  As I've gotten older, I see that more often than anything else these days.  I'll give you two examples:

Men tend to do it to prevent from looking naive.  Some guys will act as if they "know-it-all" to impress you rather than admitting that they could use some help with whatever that they are doing.  Example: A guy I know started a podcast.  I've been podcasting for over a decade.  I know that the type of podcast that you wish to have and the frequency that you plan on doing it can determine what kind of setup you may need.  When he told me his plan, I told him to reach out to me if he needed some insight or advice purchasing equipment.  He told me that he had it figured out and did his research and knew exactly what he wanted to buy.

He spent almost $1300 for his podcasting equipment for something that fizzled out in less than a month.  Then he asked me if I wanted to buy any of his equipment.  I told him, "No.  I'd never spend that much on equipment in the first place unless I was making my podcast a full-time job."  His pride made him lie to me in the beginning when he said that he knew what he was doing when he didn't.  And that was a very expensive lesson to him.  I'm not saying that I'm an expert, but I do have experience, and sometimes two heads are better than one.

Women lie for pride's sake, but for different reasons.  I once worked with a young lady who would participate in relationship discussions with us in the break room from time-to-time.  She always bragged about how she is just "doing her" and isn't paying men any attention.  She said that she was abstaining from sex and would make the next man wait because "she knew her worth".  She was always the most vocal whenever we participated in the conversations.  No man was ever going to get over on her!

Well, to this day, she doesn't know that I knew the guy that she was sleeping with at the time.  Ms. Abstinence actually had a restraining order against her for stalking him and his girlfriend.  He'd already bragged to me prior to my break room conversations with her that he'd slept with her a few times and she wouldn't leave him alone and she ultimately started harassing his woman.

All while she was telling us how she was "this and that" every day, dude was passing his phone around regularly showing nude pics of her. It made me feel badly for her to wonder how many people knew she was lying about how she "handles" men.

Look, we all lie.  But it's more to it than doing so to get out of trouble these days.  Social media tends to influence some of us to appear a certain way that we're not in real life.  How many times has someone that you know very well posted something that you knew wasn't true?  More than you can count?

Guys, it's okay to say, "I don't know" instead of acting like you know what you're doing and costing yourself time and money.  Tell someone "I need your help" with something and learn to take instructions sometimes.

Ladies, you may want to reconsider some of the things you claim you do or don't do with guys because guys talk more than ever these days.  There is no longer a code that guys live by.  Don't have these guys fool you into thinking that they don't "kiss and tell" and have you looking stupid in these streets.

It's time for all of us to be adults and to stop lying.

The Mannings vs. The Sanders: Two Families, Two Cultures, One Game

If there’s one thing football has always been good at, it’s showing us who America really is. You don’t even need to look at the scoreboard — just watch how we talk about players, how we celebrate them, and how we tear them down. Nowhere is that clearer than when you compare two of the sport’s “first families”: the Mannings and the Sanders.

On one side, you’ve got the Mannings — Archie, Peyton, Eli, and the new kid on the block, Arch. The clean-cut Southern gentlemen of football. The type who’ll throw for 450 yards, four touchdowns, beat you by 28 points and still say “it was a team effort” in the postgame interview. They don’t talk trash, they don’t dance in the end zone, and they definitely don’t remind you how great they are — even though everyone already knows.

Then you’ve got the Sanders clan — Deion, Shilo, and Shedeur — the walking embodiment of “I told you so.” The shades, the chains, the music, the swagger, the showmanship. Theirs is a brand of confidence that was born in barbershops and raised on the block. It’s unapologetically loud. It’s meant to be seen. Because for generations, if you weren’t seen, you were invisible.

Here’s the thing though: neither family is wrong. They’re just different expressions of greatness. The Mannings built a legacy through quiet dominance. The Sanders built theirs through loud excellence. But our reaction to each says more about us than it does about them.

Mainstream America has always had a soft spot for the Mannings — the wholesome image, the self-deprecating humor, the humble superstar vibe. That’s the “right” way to succeed. It’s the classic narrative of the quiet professional, the humble champion. They receive the benefit of the doubt, the presumption of excellence, the infinite grace. But when Deion celebrates his way? When Shedeur points to his watch after a touchdown or posts a highlight-laced reel on Instagram? Suddenly, it’s “cocky,” “disrespectful,” or “too much.”

The contrast is cultural, not moral. In Black culture, being flashy isn’t arrogance — it’s celebration. It’s survival. It’s the way you honor the work it took to get there. Historically, culturally, the Black experience is often rooted in expressive, loud, and yes, sometimes "flashy" displays of achievement and personality. It's a style that commands attention, often because it has to. It’s the complete opposite of "act like you've been there before"; it's "let them know you're here now and you deserve to be celebrated." In white culture, aka "Mainstream America," humility is the gold standard. The Mannings fit that mold perfectly! The Sanders don’t. And that difference is exactly why one family is seen as “classy” and the other as “showy.”

When a white athlete like Peyton or Eli is reserved, it’s seen as humility. When a Black athlete like Deion or Shedeur is reserved, they can sometimes go unnoticed (ever heard of Herman Moore or Everson Walls?). But when a Black athlete is expressive and loud, it's often labeled as arrogance, a lack of respect, or a distraction. It's a double standard as old as the game itself. 

Now, fast-forward to 2025. Arch Manning and Shedeur Sanders are both trying to carve their own paths. And if we’re honest, neither has lived up to the mountain of expectations yet. But look at how the narrative plays out — Arch is “still developing,” “just needs time.” Shedeur? “Overrated,” “too distracted by fame.”

See the pattern? Same struggle, different storyline.

The Mannings represent America’s comfort zone — steady, predictable, respectable. The Sanders represent what makes America uncomfortable — confidence without apology, success that talks back. And when you line those two energies up, it’s not just football anymore. It is a cultural commentary wrapped in shoulder pads and touchdown dances.

At the end of the day, football is big enough for both. There’s room for the Manning handshake and the Sanders two-step. But the question is — can America handle both equally? Or do we still only have grace for greatness when it comes dressed in a quiet suit instead of designer shades?

Because one thing’s for sure: both families have changed the game. But only one has been allowed to do it without having to explain why.