No Sports? Now What?

Never in my adult life has there ever been a period of time that I couldn't turn on TV and find some sports to watch.  I will pretty much watch any sport just because I love the spirit of athletic competition.  But here comes this funky COVID-19 ruining things for me and millions of others around the world.  It's way too early for an April Fool's Day joke.

The coronavirus has turned into a pandemic and sporting events are being either suspended indefinitely or canceled.  And I totally understand the seriousness of it all.  This virus is spreading like the flu and is causing mass hysteria around the world.  It sucks that it took something of this magnitude to get people to do the things they should have been doing since being old enough to attend kindergarten: wash their hands regularly and cover their mouth when they sneeze/cough.  

Without sports I'll find more time to blog, clear my DVR and read some more.  And of course, I'll tune into the reality show known as "world news" to see how our elected "leaders" are handling this crisis.  I truly hate politics when it comes to emergencies.  The people are usually secondary to political agendas.  Politicians aren't beneath using a crisis to further their agenda.  Here are some examples:

• Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, apparently tried to pass a coronavirus relief bill that came with an abortion-funding loophole chaser.  This is not the time to take advantage of the situation to get a bill passed.  Shame, Nancy!  
• President Trump banned travel to the U.S. except for in the UK and Ireland.  Not because they're coronavirus-free, but I'm guessing because he has golf resorts in those two countries.  The UK and Ireland have more cases of coronavirus then some of the other countries in the travel ban.  Greed.
• There's talk about offering corporate welfare to the airlines because people aren't traveling right now.  These companies fleece the general public around each holiday by jacking up already-high prices and now they need a handout?  Ridiculous.
• Bottled water and other essentials are slowly creeping up in price during a time of need.  Anything for an extra buck, right?

Corporations are still taking advantage of U.S. citizens despite the seriousness of the crisis.  Yet we still vote the same people into office each term who allow these companies to do so.  They should drug test all voters.  

As for the coronavirus that has taken over our lives as we know it, all we can do is wait and see what happens with all of this.  Are we closer to the movie "28 Days Later"?  Lord, I hope not.  

Roger Goodell (@nflcommish), What Are You Doing To Me?

First of all, if you're not an NFL fan then you may not understand (or care about) half of the things I'm talking about in this blog post.

Every season the NFL tries to secure more and more television revenue and it's killing me as a fan.  At one time in my life, I could reach back and pull memories out of my mind of many games that most people had forgotten.  Not any more.  It's too much.  The NFL is overloading my senses and I'm starting to see a familiar pattern that I saw the NBA take 25 years ago.

The Schedule

I absolutely love football.  If it were up to me, I would attend a high school game on Friday nights, watch college games on Saturdays and the NFL on Sundays.  But, the NFL has made that next to impossible for me to do regularly.

I have a job as a PA announcer for a high school football team.  For at least six Friday nights out of the Fall, I'm calling their games.

I'm a Michigan Wolverines fan when it comes to college football.  Every Saturday I try to watch them play along with other major match-ups in the Top 25 and SEC.

My Sundays during the NFL season consist of me sitting in my man chair at 1 PM Eastern Time and pretty much remaining there until the night game ends around Midnight Eastern Time.  Then I watch the Monday Night game the next evening.  Now the Commissioner has installed another night (Thursdays) for the NFL and it's just too much for me.

If I were a college student with a ton of free time then this would be absolutely great!  But, as a grown man with a full-time job and a lady who has teen kids it's a problem.  I can't block off Sundays, Mondays, Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays for four months.  Very few people can.  But, that's what Roger Goodell is asking the die-hard fans to do.

Last year I missed more NFL games than I have ever missed since the invention of the NFL Sunday Ticket back in 1994.  I had to make decisions each week to either sacrifice the Monday game or the Thursday game because I just didn't have time to do both.  Then the worst feeling that a die-hard fan could have came over me towards the end of the season: I started to not care.

I would look to see who was playing and if it wasn't a premier team then I would find something else to do and miss the game entirely.  It's the same attitude that I developed when the NBA started coming on every single night thanks to TV money.  When the NBA was limited in its viewing I would bite, scratch and kick to see a game.  Now I won't even watch any more than a handful of games before the 2nd round of the playoffs because it's on every single night.

The saturation of the NBA did that to me over the course of just a few years and now the NFL is doing the same. A guy who could watch the two worst teams play because of his love of the game will now miss the first half of a divisional rivalry game because his life can't accommodate football four days a week.  There's just not enough time.

The Draft

Back in the day, the NFL Draft occurred in late April on a Saturday and Sunday morning.  The Draft consists of seven rounds (three rounds were on Saturday and four were on Sunday) and is completely boring to a casual fan, but an amazing event to a die-hard.  On April 20th, 2002 I had one of the best days of my life.  I was married at the time and on my honeymoon.  The NFL Draft came on that Saturday morning and my late wife gave me the entire day to watch it.  I sat in an over-sized chair and watched the first three rounds of the Draft within full-view of the ocean.  For a true football fan, it didn't get any better than that.

Fast-forward to today and what do we have?  The Draft now isn't until May (for May Sweeps) starts on Thursday night during primetime.  So, now I have to get home from work and get things done prior to the Draft starting instead of having a weekend day to relax and ease into it.  But, it gets worse: Thursday night is only for the 1st round of the Draft.  If I want to see the 2nd and 3rd rounds then I have to tune in on Friday night.

Seriously?  And then on Saturday you pick the 4th through the 7th rounds?  A three day event?  Then there's a headline today stating that Goodell wants to make it a four day event and get Sundays back in the mix?  Sorry, but I can't...

Conclusion

I've reached my limit.  Mark Cuban (owner of the Dallas Mavericks) was right.  The NFL will burn itself out in less than a decade at the rate they're going.  Guys like me will eventually start to pick and choose which games interest us and ignore the others.  It's not because we want to, but because there's just not enough time in a week to have a life and meet obligations with the NFL on three or more nights a week.

Eventually, the NFL will be on seven days a week like the NBA and MLB.  You're laughing right now, but don't say that I didn't warn you.  Just like an 18-game schedule, franchises in Canada and London, and more teams being allowed in the Playoffs, it's inevitable.  There's just too much money on the table for it not to be.

SMH.

Don't Let The Money Make You

Black people are always looking for role models and we have plenty in the world right in front of us. However, we don't want to make a movie about one unless they're an athlete, singer or actor. Uh, oh, I need to get on my soapbox for a minute.

(steps up)

Where are the movies about black doctors, counselors, teachers and people who make a real difference in the lives of millions? Why am I constantly bombarded with movies about black maids and butlers as if there aren't any black humanitarians? Why can't I watch an inspiring movie about a black person providing help instead of being "The Help?"

Let's think about some of the "black" movies for 2013: "Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain", Tyler Perry's "Temptation" and his movie, "We the Peeples", "Fruitvale Station," "42," "Haunted House" with the Wayans, and "After Earth."  Two comedies, two Tyler Perry flicks, a tragedy, a sports movie on racism and a sci-fi movie with Will Smith and his kid. Those are my options. No movie like the one on Steve Jobs. No "Great Gatsby."  No "Wolf of Wall Street."  Do you see what I'm saying?

People probably think that no one would watch it, but I disagree. Black people attend the movies probably more than any other race. It's not that we don't crave quality movies about role models, it's just that Hollywood won't make movies like that. In fact, we may only be a decade away from all black movies being complete foolishness at the theaters just like today's music is a joke on some of the mainstream radio stations.

Hollywood isn't going to make these movies. People like my man Archie in the Virgin Islands may some day, but he's not financially in a position to do that now to my knowledge. This is why people like Harry Belafonte get upset and preach about social responsibility. Because the black people capable of making this type of impact in society aren't interested in making a difference, they're only interested in making more money. So, since no one wants to be a leader in 2013, then black people who really matter in this country become irrelevant to society.

People are always quick to say "make that money, don't let the money make you." Well, that's what's been happening for the last 15-20 years. Now, what a person does with their money is their business, but what I say with my mouth is mine. And some things just need to be said.

People are letting the money "make them" by dictating everything they do or don't do on their next paycheck. "If I speak out against this group then I'll lose revenue." If you think this way, then make no mistake about it, the dollar is making you.

Back to the movies... I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with the movies that I named. I loved "42." I'm sure that I'll laugh at Kevin Hart's movie when I finally see it. I'll even watch "After Earth" once it reaches the $3 everything must go bin at Target.

I'm just saying that black people need some balance in America. We need some good to equal out the bad and the foolishness. For every Trinidad James we need a Kendrick Lamar. For every Shaunie O'Neal, we need a Kerry Washington. We can't have 20 reality shows of black women pulling out each other's weave to every one primetime drama.

If I were a white person who didn't personally know any black folks, I'd lock my doors every time I saw someone who even looked like they had a tan. Because the movies say if they're not working for me, then TV says that I should be afraid of them. All because we don't have representation.

I'm off my soap box now.

(steps down)

Technology Needs to Slow Down

Because you're dying to check Facebook from your TV, right?

I'm a geek.  I love electronics and I can read articles and listen to podcasts on them for hours at a time.  However, sometimes, enough is enough.  These electronic companies like Samsung, LG, etc. are going to run themselves out of business for being so greedy.  Everyone wants to create the next great thing every other month.  It's like crack.

Standard definition television was good enough for over 50 years until high definition came along.  Once HD arrived, the televisions flew off of the shelves.  This made the greedy electronic companies very excited!  Instead of perfecting the HDTV to get through the next 50 years of television, they decided to release a 3D television just a few years later.  Then SmartTVs became the rage.  Although I'm not sure how smart it was to create a TV that can do the exact same thing as my Xbox 360, Blu Ray player, Roku and home theater receiver does.  Sounds dumb to me.  Redundant much?  Do I really need four or five devices that give me Hulu Plus and Netflix access?  Can't TV's just be TV's?

A few months from now, Ultra HDTVs will be the next big thing.  Because HD-3D television isn't enough.  I'm guessing we're not too far from actors coming to our houses to perform the shows we like to watch.  After all, it doesn't get much realer than that.

Cell phones are the same way, if not worse.  Samsung currently has 44 different types of cell phones on display at their website.  44!  And those are just the smartphones, not including the flip phones.  Why would anyone need 44 different types of phones to sell?  Oh, I know why!  Because every month, they have to try to come out with the next iPhone killer.  Instead of worrying about competition for Siri, why not do like Motorola and focus on improving battery life?

Click to enlarge and read the comparisons.

Apple is the same with their iPad.  Every year, there's a new iPad and it's basically the same as the last.  The only difference is a little more memory here, a different color there and an extra feature.  That will be $450, thank you very much.  You know that new iPads compare about the same to old iPads because they're roughly the same price.  If anything major was different about them, then it would seem that the price margin would have more of a gap.  To Apple's credit, they've sold more of the almost exact same product than any company that comes to mind.  Their marketing department is legendary!  How many people reading this just looked up and saw their iPhone, iPod and iPad mini charging next to one another?

I wish these companies would just slow down already!  People are catching on to the fact that every new item you put out is basically the last version with one or two more add-ons.  Try looking at successful models like the Xbox and follow their lead.  It released its first model and 2001 and didn't come out with the Xbox 360 until a presidential term later.  Now, they're rumored to come out with the Xbox 720 (prototype name) at the end of this year, eight years after the 360.  Not only have they taken their time to perfect their product, they've also allowed time for their previous product to actually sell!  Imagine that!

It sucks as a consumer because something you buy today is rendered irrelevant in less than two years.  I bought a Blu Ray player from Samsung three years ago.  It would receive updates to the firmware roughly every other month.  Well, the updates stopped after a little over a year because the model had been discontinued. A new model was out, so they stopped supporting the model that I expected to have for the next five years.

Needless to say, I'll never buy another Blu Ray player from Samsung again.  Not just because they kicked my player to the curb in such a short time, but also because they rejected my (honest) review of their product from their website.  That's right.  Samsung picks and choose which product reviews they'll allow.  I'm guessing the fact that I said the device "requires me to enter time/date during setup yet was too rushed for them to even have a clock display on it" was offensive to them.

People don't need a new HDTV every two or thee years.  And with two year agreements being the norm with cell phone crooks companies, people don't need a new phone every six months.  You companies will have to learn the hard way when you have all of this merchandise sitting in your warehouses with nowhere to go.  Best Buys are already shutting down across the country because they can't live on holiday sales alone.

Now, I'm far from an expert, but I'm just playing a hunch here.  I think companies will start to fold/downsize within a year or two due to lost revenue.  There are just some instances where technology needs to slow down.  We've figured out how you operate.  Take your time and give us a product worthy of the astronomical prices that you're charging.

Family / Dollar

No, I'm not talking about the department store. I'm taking about the choice between what's more important: family or dollars? Is Black Thursday Friday now a reflection of the "American Way?" There's so much greed in this country that it's a wonder that anyone cares about his fellow man these days.

Everything is centered around making profits. Everything. Black Friday (which is not a holiday for black people) has always been the one day that retailers could rejoice in knowing that they would make a profit. People line up in front of stores just waiting for the doors to open at 4 or 5 AM. After the doors open, they'll stampede down the aisles looking for that bargain item of choice.

However, things change. With the internet now being woven into our daily lives, Cyber Monday became a second day for retailers to make a killing on sales.  Consumers could sit in front of their PC's and point/click their way to great deals.  But, even that isn't enough for the retailers.  Hmmmmm....  How can they make even more cash?

Oh, I know!  They'll open up the stores on Thursday evening and start the sales then!  It doesn't matter if employees are pulled away from their family's dinner table because a profit is more important!  Right?  If it doesn't make dollars then it doesn't make cents (sense).

Stores across the country opened their doors early which required employees to cut their Thanksgiving short and I think that it sucks.  Don't get me wrong.  It's essential that certain people work on holidays.  Customer service centers are always needed to provide help for cable, cell phone, insurance companies.  But do you really need someone to sell you an HDTV at 9 PM on Thanksgiving night?

I had a discussion with my homie, M&M, about how Target and Walmart employees were threatening to strike over the fact that they had to work on a holiday.  They were upset that these stores were taking them away from their family time and rest.  M&M agreed. 

He mentioned how when Sam Walton was alive, he stressed his employees being happy at Walmart.  However, when he died in 1992, his family did the exact opposite of what he would have wanted.  They started opening on Sundays and eventually went to a 24/7 superchain store.  The employees became an after-thought because the only focus of Walmart was to make money.  It was no longer an all-American store either as agreements were made with China to make just about everything in the store.

So, the employees have to come to work and we, the consumers, take full advantage of it without giving it a thought.  We roll into these stores with these disgruntled employees and then get upset over poor customer service.  I guess that's the trade-off you get.  You get employees selling you an HDTV on a Thursday night, but you get the attitude along with it because that person can't even enjoy their own TV at home with their family.  When employees become only a warm body to their company, then you can rest assure that the customer service will suffer.  See AT&T.  If you don't believe me, then go to a Chick-Fil-A restaurant if you're ever in the South and see how great their customer service is.  It's the best I've seen ever and I've been to a lot of places.  Not working on Sundays or holidays does something for morale.  I'm just saying.

With each passing year, money becomes even more of a focus.  How can we possibly expect children to learn how to care from one another when adults don't?  Is it so important to add another million to the billion that you already have that you'll cut someone's holiday short?  Why not use the internet for early sales on Thursdays instead of requiring the physical locations to open?

Don't get me wrong.  I love convenience.  It's nice to need something in the middle of the night and know that I can go get it.  However, I understand that employees have lives and I wouldn't want to come in between them any more than someone doing it to me.  I'm pretty sure that not one CEO worked last Thursday.  They sat at home and took naps after eating turkey while Joe Sixpack and Sally Housecoat had to pay for a babysitter on a family holiday so they could work overnight.

I once was naive enough to think that things could change, but I think that we're too far gone in this country.  We don't care about each other and eventually, we will be one step away from cutting each other's throat for a competitive edge.  These big corporations don't care if you spend time with your family or not.  They just want you to make their money.  Yeah, you may get holiday pay, but wouldn't you at least want the option of your family or a dollar?

Am I wrong here?  Do stores put more focus on money than their employees well-being and will it hurt us as a country in the long run?

Hold The Rat Poison, Please?

Half of the country was lined up in front of stores last week to get a shot (or shots) at winning $640 million being offered in the Mega Millions lottery. It was the largest jackpot I can ever remember seeing. Three people had the winning numbers and all have claims on the prize money which will divide three ways between $105 million - $158 million (lump sum pay out) depending on which publication you read. Well, one of those people may have to spend some time in court before she can lay her hands on any money.

Meet Mirlande Wilson. A 37-year old, single mother of seven who works at McDonald's. Well, Mirlande went to the local convenience store and bought some tickets for the lottery. She was also in charge of buying tickets for 15 of her co-workers as well. You see, they had all decided to pool their money to take their shot at the jackpot. Each of them chipped in $5 for tickets.

Enter controversy.

Mirlande, after winning, said that she won with a ticket that she bought with her own money. Yeah, right. Mirlande bought tickets for the group and had those tickets put into a safe. Later that day, her boss gave her more money and asked that she get more tickets for the drawing. Mirlande bought those tickets and took them home, never revealing the numbers. After the drawing was made, she claimed that she bought an additional ticket with her own money and that's the ticket that won. She even had the audacity to call one of her co-workers screaming, "I won! I won!"

Not "we won."

She later claimed that she is not sure if she won and surveillance cameras even show that a man actually bought the winning ticket. So, who knows what really happened? Needless to say, there are some very angry, $7.50-an-hour-making McDonald's employees in the state of Maryland who think they're missing their fair share of $7+ million. All I know is this: my advice to Mirlande is to get out of town quick, fast and in a hurry! And since so many people recognize your face across the country by now, the next time you order a Big Mac, make sure to tell them to "hold the rat poison, please?"

Is Mirlande right or wrong to not split the winnings that she can't legitimately prove she paid for?

"We will spatula-slap her if we see her around these parts again!"

Hip-Hop Sell Outs

Hip-hop has always been about creating trends, but they've taken it to an entirely new level now.  In fact, it's not trending, it's advertising.

Back in the day, Run-DMC had a song called "My Adidas" and they professed their love for the shoes they wore without laces.  It was very rare that an actual product was marketed in most rap back then because rap was in a different place at the time.  Rap was about self-promotion of talent and / or provoking thought.

Today's rap is about the promotion of materialistic things than anything else.  CNN reported that out of the top 30 hip hop songs on the Billboard charts, 27 of them mention the name of a vehicle, 22 mention miscellaneous products from clothing to rims and 19 of them mention a brand of liquor.  The liquor companies stated that they don't market products to minors, but that they do reward hip-hop stars with endorsements for promoting their products.  That appears to be half of the problems in our inner cities today.  A focus on materialistic things and alcohol is being pounded into their ears on mainstream radio to our kids.

In contrast, the top 30 country songs on the Billboard charts revealed 7 miscellaneous products (mostly blue jeans and power tools), 4 mentions of liquor and 4 mentions of vehicles. Check out this article for more info on rap's influence on our youth through their brand promoting. Here's an excerpt from that article:

Alcohol companies, of course, are happy to get the recognition, but it seems that many singers are also tangentially involved in the alcohol business. Jay-Z, for instance, owns a percentage of Armadale Vodka while Snoop Dogg was the face for Landy Cognac in 2008 and, not coincidentally, sang a song about it called Luv Drunk.

Now, studies are saying that US teens hear three brand names for every hour of rap music they listen to. Given that the average teen listens to 2.5 hours of music per day, your average kid is hearing 8 alcohol brand names daily.

Some people say American teens are listening to a lot more than simply 2.5 hours of music, suggesting that they hear up to 34 alcohol brand names every day while they listen to music that promotes a "luxury lifestyle characterized by degrading sexual activity, wealth, partying, violence and the use of drugs."

It is no coincidence that the brand names that are most frequently mentioned are also the ones the teenage drinkers seem to prefer.

Today's rap deserves its own genre.  Something to separate it from the artists who came along over 25 years ago and made it mainstream.  We have Conscious Rap (Public Enemy, KRS-1), Booty Music (95 South, 2 Live Crew), Gangsta Rap (NWA, Eazy-E) and Mainstream Rap (MC Hammer and Fresh Prince). Don't get me wrong. People in the 80's wore gold ropes and drove nice cars, but that wasn't the focus of their lyrics. They told stories of life in the hood, exposed racism and political loopholes or bragged about how lyrically talented they were.

Also, I don't want to lump all of today's rappers into this materialistic corner I'm painting. There are some rappers who are truly talented in today's rap game despite what they're rapping about: Paul Wall, Lil' Wayne, Eminem, Kanye among a few others whose names escape me right now. But a majority of the people I'm referring to who aren't all that talented and / or push products every chance they get: P-Diddy, Soulja Boy, Gucci Mane and Rick Ross. Some of the songs may be catchy, but they're really not saying anything when it's all said and done.

I'm wearing a lot of jewelry, so therefore, I must be talented.

Now everything is about what I'm drinking/smoking/wearing/driving and how many women I'm banging. Music videos with rented women, homes and cars (you don't think these guys really own mansions and Lamborghinis, do you?). I don't know if we'll ever see again a powerful video like P.E.'s "Fight the Power," a collaboration of artists to perform a modern day "Self-Destruction" or even come across a mainstream group similar to the X-Clan.

Is this what rap has become?  No.  At least not to me. If this is what these artists want to do, then so be it. But, don't allow it to be on mainstream radio where anyone of any age can gain access to listen. Even HBO won't show a Rated: R movie until after 8 PM when kids are supposed to be in bed. Put restrictions on this music so I don't have to worry about my eight year old god son singing songs about Ciroc.

I refuse to call today's hip-hop "rap."  Call it "commercial hip-hop" or "ad rap," but don't call it rap. Contributing to the destruction of our youth all for the sake of a buck?

A bunch of hip-hop sell outs.




.

C.R.E.A.M.

For the old school hip-hoppers, I'm sure that you are very familiar with the title of this post.

Cash Rules Everything Around Me was a Wu-Tang chant for the ages. If you're curious or just need a flash back, then click here and you won't be disappointed.

Oh, how I miss real rap.

But, I digress. Let me tell you a story about a lady named Meghan Brown. This bombshell Florida beauty queen had a run-in with an intruder. Let me allow you to read the details from TheClutchMagazine.com:

Dude still has bruises under both eyes

"On March 12th, the former Miss Tierra Verde pumped four bullets into Albert Hill, an intruder who broke into her home.

After Hill, 43, forced himself into the mansion she shares with her fiancé, they began to scuffle. During the robbery, Hill apparently demanded money and punched Brown’s fiancé, Bobby Planthaber, repeatedly in the face. Upon seeing her fiancé struggle with the intruder, Brown grabbed her .38-caliber pink pistol and fired, killing Hill.

Although the "modern day Stacey Dash" and her fiancé insist the robber, Albert Hill, was a stranger, the police aren’t so sure. Even though he’s dead, the investigation is ongoing."

Now, that's not quite the entire story. At least not the part I want to discuss. It seems that Meghan recognizes that her window for 15 minutes of fame has opened from this tragic event. Shortly after her shooting incident, guess who's doing photo shoots with hopes of doing ads for the NRA and / or Smith & Wesson?

How many guys are going out to buy a gun right now based solely on this ad?

I won't lie. I bought six guns myself after seeing this. Anyway, here's Brown's take on things,“I wanted to make some money. I wanted to capitalize on this. I’m the perfect example of why women should have a gun,” Brown told The Daily.

Hey, at least she's honest on both accounts. She admitted to wanting to make a few coins off of the shooting and she was right in saying women should be able to defend themselves. Although Meghan doesn't necessarily need a gun to defend herself. A year ago, she went WWE on her fiancé to the point that he had to call the police for help. She did a Chris Brown (any relation?) on him and attacked him in parked car with blows to the face and chest. She said she only slapped him because he put her dog out of the car in an attempt to get her out since he was breaking up with her.

Side note: how did this 43-year old chinless, Gumby look-a-like pull a nugget like Meghan? Guys, it just goes to show that any man can look like a nickel and find a "dyme" long as he has some game.




Does Meghan deserve her shot at fame? Should the killing of an intruder lead to her being a sexy spokeswoman for a gun company?

What do you think?

Why Can't I See Wanda Sykes?

Garbage! Straight up garbage! It's a doggone shame how our government lets Corporate America rob us blind every single day.

I was trying to be a good husband and surprise The Mrs. with a trip to Biloxi to check out Wanda Sykes next weekend. No reason. Just to relax and enjoy a good show.

Well, guess how much that trip would cost me for one night? Almost $800 freakin' dollars!

A couple of weeks ago I saw Wanda tickets were on sale for the IP Casino on the Gulf Coast. Now, for those who don't know, I'm a huge Wanda Sykes fan. In fact, The Mrs. probably should have felt threatened by her for a few years before Wanda announced she was gay. At that point, I knew my chances of getting with her were, uh, pretty much slim-to-none. But, hey, what can I say? Funny women are attractive to me and Wanda is all-that.



Anyway, the tickets were $45-$65, so I went to Ticketmaster to buy a couple.

"Let's see... Two tickets... Best available... $260 per ticket!!!???"

I couldn't believe my eyes! I kept reading because some where in fine print it has to say that I get to stay in Wanda's room after the show or something for a price this excessive.

After being disappointed with the contents of the fine print, I try Stubhub, Tickets, Razorgator and any other site that comes to mind and the cheapest ticket I found was $70 for "general admission" in the back of the room.

I decided I'd better at least check the price of the hotel of the casino where the comedy show will be. If I can at least get a room, I'm sure I can score some tickets locally at a reasonable price.

"Hmmmmm, one night.... two adults.... September 10th..."

(click)

"$270 per night!!!!!????"

Now, I'm positive that Wanda comes with the room! I just stayed at this hotel less than a year ago for $90 and now you want to triple your price?

Why is it legal for the ticket companies to buy up all of the tickets and then scalp them back to us for triple the face value?

How can hotels run for $65 a night, but jump to $250 a night when a special event rolls into town?

All I wanted to do was take The Mrs. on a nice weekend to see Wanda and Corporate America has foiled me once again.

I know one thing: you all better stop voting for these people on the ballot just because they have a (D) or an (R) in front of their name. Because no matter which group runs the White House, I still can't catch a break. You all keep arguing with one another while the White House officials keep pocketing our hard-earned money.



Oh, well. I guess I'll have to think of something else for date night with The Mrs. Maybe it worked out for her anyway that we couldn't make the show. After all, it was Wanda Sykes we were going to see.