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Do Women Dress for Men or for Other Women?

Shilpa Shetty

I used to wonder this, but now I'm pretty sure that women dress for other women.  It was finally confirmed to me after seeing one Red Carpet photo after another over the years: women don't care about what men like.  They care about what women like.

Sounds odd, but I believe it to be true.  A woman (not girl) knows what makes a man happy.  It doesn't take much to please us aesthetically.  If a woman is hot to us, then she's hot to us regardless if she's in a $15 outfit from Target or a $200 outfit from Macy's.  But, ladies know that other women will scan their outfits for head-to-toe looking for a flaw!

An online survey revealed that 6 out of 10 women (ages 18-30) dressed for a huge occasion with their peers in mind and not their man.  That means that 60% of women in that age range prefer compliments from their friends more than their significant other.

Hmmph.  See if I ever compliment a woman in that age range on her outfit again.

The average woman spends 40 minutes getting ready to go out with her man, but over an hour getting ready to go out with her girlfriends.  Wait.  Seriously?  I'm getting shorted over 20 minutes of prep time when I'm the one paying for dinner?

As many award shows as I've watched in my lifetime, I never knew that the extravagant dresses were to get the attention of other women in the industry.  When J-Lo and Toni Braxton (below) wore those phenomenal outfits at the Grammys, I thought it was to give men something to talk about at the water cooler on Monday morning.  I had no idea that they were truly wanting female adoration.

SMH.  I'll never figure women out.  I guess this is why they're so competitive and have such a hard time making friends.  I can wear sweatpants and a t-shirt around my homies and never feel an ounce of judgement.  I guess that's not the case for the ladies.  Even their friends judge them.  Especially their friends is probably what I should be saying.

Ladies, all I can do is hope that you all keep trying to impress one another because the men absolutely love it.  I guess that I shouldn't care why you do it, but instead only that you do it.  It would be nice if some women that I see at Walmart had some friends to impress because some ladies look like microwaved garbage in the stores.  I guess they missed the memo.

Fellas, if you want your woman to look her best, then tell her that you've invited her friends to meet you two at the bar.  At least you'll know that you're getting her best efforts.

How do you feel about the fact that women dress for other women and not for their man?

Christina Hendricks

Halle Berry

Jennifer Lopez

Toni Braxton

Megan Good

Get Ready for Kimye!



Move over, Bey/Jay... there's a new baby coming to town!

What better way to close out 2012 and enter into 2013 than the announcement of a royal pregnancy!  No, not those people overseas, but our local royalty here in the states!  We don't do the fancy titles and pompous stuff here.  A sex tape and a rap album will put you on Mount Rushmore in the states these days!  So, without further ado, I present to you: Kanye West and Kim Kardashian!

Now, now, just wait.  Hold on.  I know some of you are frowned up and you think that I'm being facetious.  And in a way, I am mostly, but also in a way, I'm not.  You see, royalty is in the eye of the beholder idiot fan.  Some of us treat athletes as royalty.  Some of us treat actors as royalty.  So, why can't a socialite and rapper be included as well?  After all, all of the above walk on red carpets like kings and queens, don't they?  They have high-level security and have people following them, 24/7, looking for a photo op.  Sounds like royalty to me!

Kim is rumored to be 3 months pregnant with Kanye's seed.  So, I'm guessing that she's known about the pregnancy for a while.  But, what better time to release the news than when everyone in the world, who isnt' partying or drunk (and some who are), will be tuned into TV to see the "ball drop" for the New Year?  And what story will lead each show tonight?

"Get Ready for Kimye in 2013!"

This is marketing gold!  This is bigger than the season finale of "Scandal" and it will be much bigger than anything Jay-Z and Beyonce' could have ever imagined for their child.

Wait, wait, wait.  Okay, there you go giving me the side-eye again.  You're thinking, "Q, you act as if these people planned this."

Uh, yeah, pretty much.  Look, I'm skeptical by nature.  The reason is: a majority of the people that are on TV or radio are trying to pull the wool over my eyes.  Shows are passing themselves off as reality when it's a known fact that many are scripted (yeah, I'm talking to you, Tru TV).  "News" media outlets are passing opinions and assumptions as facts.  So, why should I believe that a rapper at the top of his game along with the hottest body in America (who's still legally married) isn't doing the same with this announcement?

Personally, I don't care that Kim is pregnant.  I hope that she has a happy and healthy, bouncing baby boy or girl, but it has no bearing on my life.  In fact, I'm not coming down on her or Kanye at all.  I think they're geniuses, or at least surround themselves with them.  We'll hear potential, stupid baby names all night on New Year's Eve and a few months from now, people will be guessing the baby's gender.  Maybe that can be centered around some upcoming awards show in the Spring or something.  You know it just won't be revealed on a Tuesday afternoon on some peron's Tumblr site.  Some huge event will be going on when that's revealed, I'm sure.

So, congratulations to Kim Kardashian and Kanye West on their child!  Maybe you come up with a creative name, trademark it and add millions to your millions!  I do hope that he or she will at least get their talent from their dad's side of the family. 

So, Kim and Kanye sitting in a tree... Business decision or just a couple in love who coincidentally revealed it around New Year's?



"That's a nice blog post Q made for us, huh?  Just look at it!"

Choosing Emotions Over Common Sense

When I first started my blog, two years ago today, it was called "Thank, Q for Common Sense" for a reason. I felt the desire to inject some "common sense" into the blogging world. Although people are welcome to blog about whatever they would like, I thought there were too many blogs that lacked perspective. So many blogs seemed as if they were based on what the writer felt from the heart instead of from the brain.

I didn't want to do that. I wanted my blog to be strictly based on logic and perspective because that's how I try to live my life. Because of that, it gets frustrating to come across people who don't have the same concept. I wish people would stop choosing emotions over common sense. Just because you like something or someone doesn't mean that you should defend that idea/person at all costs.

I remember when the Chris Brown / Rihanna incident happened how so many people on Twitter were coming to his defense. "Well, we don't know what Rihanna said to him that pissed him off."

"Everyone deserves a second chance."

"Leave Chris Brown alone."

Really? So, simply because you like the guy (or you're a fan), he isn't guilty of anything? R. Kelly. Charlie Sheen. Lindsay Lohan. I can go on-and-on. These people have been accused of some heinous acts yet they're even more popular than ever. Why? Because you like their music or they make you laugh in a sitcom or movie. Ummmm, okay.

Well, let me take that back. I'm not saying that you can't be fans. I'm just saying that I think it looks stupid to defend them when people talk about the heinous acts that they committed. I think that's what's wrong with this country. We use our emotions to make decisions (which wind up being irrational). Everything offends us because we're too emotional. It doesn't matter if it's a true statement or not because common sense isn't factored into the equation. If it hurts our feelings, then we lash out. We'll even lash out over something that has nothing to do with us. Twitter blew up months ago from people defending Whitney Houston's substance abuse problem after her death. People who didn't even know her were pissed off at just the mere thought that someone who was in rehab as recently as last year was speculated to have overdosed... because they like her music. I even had someone on Facebook get mad at me for not Liking her "We Love Whitney" fan page. I told her respectfully that I didn't want to join the page which resulted in her Unliking my fan page.

Wow. Because I don't feel the same way you do about a person, I'm of no use to you any more, huh? So be it.

Tantrums used to be a kid thing.  Not in 2012.

People, I'm tired. I'm tired of being the only person willing to put myself in other people's shoes to understand their point. I'm tired of stating a fact only to have it offend someone because it applies to them or someone they know. I'm tired of being the voice of reason in an unpopular situation. Maybe two years has been enough time to fight stupidity. Maybe it's time for me to terminate my blog and move on with my life and find another hobby.

Psych! Are you nuts? LOL! That's actually what drives my blog. The more ignorance I encounter, the more posts I type. I shall continue with my message because some things just need to be said. I will "blog 'til I fall" and hope that I can just get one person to stop and think. You don't have to agree with me, but at least consider things from someone else's perspective. And remember this, as I blow out the candles on Year Two: common sense is like deodorant, the people who need it the most don't use it. (drops mic)



This country used to be mentally tough. What happened?

Childhood Crushes

When I was a teen, I had posters all over my wall. Posters from different women that I thought were hot. As a teen-aged boy, I was pretty picky about who I put on my wall. I didn't just go for any woman showing cleavage or bending over with a water hose. I only chose celebrities to grace my walls, especially my freshman year in college.

Although I was fond of women like Lynda Carter, Jayne Kennedy and Debbie Morgan, I was very selective of the posters that I bought. I'm unsure if posters are still huge sellers in the local Wal-Marts and K-Marts now, but when I was a teen, so many athletes and celebrities had their own poster. The first poster I remember buying with my own cash was a poster of Lisa Lisa the singer. When her album "Spanish Fly" debuted with the hit song, "Head to Toe," I instantly became a fan of hers. I can honestly say that I was just as big of a fan of her music as I was of her looks. "Lost in Emotion," "Little Jackie Wants to Be A Star," and "All Cried Out" were just a few of her hits from the mid-to-late 80's.

Thanks to Lisa Lisa, I was stuck in a light-skin/long hair phase when it came to women for a while. My dating habits reflected that as well until I got to college and met the most gorgeous, dark-skinned, short-haired beauty named Freda. Another story for another blog post, I guess.

Around the age of 16, I started playing tennis with a kid who was new to the neighborhood. He and I would go to the historical campus of Tougaloo College and play for hours. Because of my interest in the sport, I started watching more tennis on television. That's when I came across an Argentine who got my attention...

Gabriela Sabatini was a very popular tennis player in the late 80's/early 90's. On top of having good looks, she was a really good tennis player as well. While always sporting her Sergio Tacchini attire, she gave Steffi Graf fits on the tennis courts, although Steffi usually wound up winning. The very first time (and only time) I ever joined a fan club was for hers. I sent a letter off to Argentina along with $1.50 to start receiving her newsletter and also get a photo. It must have taken two months for me to receive my membership into her official club. In fact, by the time I received it, I'd forgotten I'd even sent off for it. In all honesty, I think that one letter was all I received and it did not contain a photo. It was a letter signed by her father welcoming me to the club and stating great things were to come.

Well, I'm still waiting. Gabby, you owe me $1.50.

When it was time for me to move on to college, I packed my posters and brought them with me. I'd accumulated quite a few of them and a dormitory wall seemed like the perfect gallery setting. I had Apollonia, Sheila E., Vanity, and Sheila Easton to name a few. If you have no idea who any of those women are, then you were probably born after 1985.

I treasured each and everyone of those posters in my collection, but I would have thrown them all away for one poster of the next lady...

Pamela Suzette Grier. I had no clue Pam even existed until my college roommate and I decided to rent a movie one Friday night. We wanted something we'd never seen before and it had to contain action. We stumbled across "Foxy Brown" and we were hooked like Rush Limbaugh on painkillers. Pam Grier was the absolute most stunning woman to ever grace the movie screen. If anyone wanted to argue with me that the 1974 version of Pam Grier was not the finest woman to ever walk the planet, then I would immediately Amish-rake fight them. Try me. Just try me.

My roommate and I started renting her movies every single weekend. "Coffy," "Sheba, Baby" and more. On a Friday night, close to 10 guys would be in our dorm room watching (what we didn't know at the time) the first black action heroine. Between her and Cynthia Rothrock (blow the dust off of that name), we had action-packed weekends when it came to movies. I was pretty much out of "poster mode" in this point of my life. I had my first long-term girlfriend and she "grandfathered" my old posters in, but wouldn't have been too happy about buying any new ones. Besides, Pam Grier's movies were almost two decades old when I started watching them. I wouldn't have been able to find any posters of her any way. She'd temporarily stopped doing movies during a four year stint on "Miami Vice" and never stumbled upon anything big again until Quentin Tarantino's "Jackie Brown" came out in 1997. And she was still good-looking at age 46 in that movie. But, had I been born a decade earlier, I'm sure I would have had her poster.

So, here I am now, 20+ years later, blogging about these ladies who were my childhood crushes. I decided to Google them to see what they look like now and what they're doing. Pam Grier is still in the acting business and will appear in a movie later this year. Lisa Lisa had a solo comeback about three years ago that I've yet to hear, so I'm guessing that it didn't hit the Billboard Top 100. Gabriela Sabatini is back in Argentina and doing a lot of charity work from what I've read. I also read that she's still single. No sense in pissing off The Mrs., so I'll keep my comments to myself.

Before you could follow a celebrity on a social network, you could put a poster on your wall or join their fan club to connect with them. Unlike today, where celebs saturate us with Instagrams of themselves and re-tweet more than a stuttering baby bird, you only had talk show interviews and magazine articles to learn about them.

Below are all three ladies in the most recent photos that I could find. I think that time has been kind to all three of them. I have no idea where my posters are at this time. They could have met their demise once I moved from college back home. They could be in my parents' storage room in their back yard. I haven't a clue. All I know is this: if I could find them at this very moment.... I'd sell them on eBay faster than a ho outrunning a pimp. What? You thought that nostalgia would make me keep them?

You haven't been reading my blog long enough.  Money is a motivator...

Lisa (Lisa) Velez, 46; Gabriela Sabatini, 41; Pam Grier, 62

Who were your childhood crushes?

Is It Stupid If You Can Afford It?

"They cost how much!!!!????"

Lil' Wayne was spotted at last month's NBA All-Star Game with custom Beats by Dre headphones on his head. The headphones, which were made with 114 carats of diamond by Graff Diamonds, were worn courtside by the rapper with a value of over $1 million dollars. Yes, you read that right.

Now, why someone would wear headphones to an all-star game is beyond me, but maybe he likes listening to music in crowds. The average person would read this and say that "it's the dumbest thing they've ever seen." They would probably also say that "only an idiot would spend that much money on headphones."

However, Lil' Wayne is rumored to be worth roughly $85 million dollars, so will this $1 million hurt him? Only if he allows himself to fall into the same traps that an Allen Iverson (blew $200 million) or MC Hammer (lost $35 million) did when they threw away their bucks. Iverson played 15 seasons in the NBA and was rumored to never take luggage on road trips. His teammates have even said that he would buy a new wardrobe in every city and just leave everything he bought in the hotel room when they left. MC Hammer had a waterfall in his swimming pool on top of buying elaborate gifts for his dance team (Rolexes, cars, etc.)

Lil' Wayne has been reported to own close to $4 million in vehicles and another $6 million in jewelry. That's $10 million dollars out of $85 million. Does he own property? Does he have investments? Who knows? He's rumored to be pretty smart with his money when it comes to making dollars from producing other rappers. Only time will tell if he goes broke or not.



Is it stupid if you can afford it?

Why Madonna is Still The Baddest Chick

There are so many famous people in the world, but very few legends. In fact, I think people don't understand how to be a legend these days. Sure, they're a legend in their own minds, but to the eyes of others, they're just a passing fad. There is an art to being a legend and most of today's "celebs" don't have a clue of how to do it. They need to seek advice from some of the old school artists.

Madonna could probably easily out-draw any female performer because she's a rare act. That's right. If you want to know why Madonna is still the baddest chick in the game, it's because she's a recluse. Have you ever heard of the phrase, "you never miss a good thing until it's gone?"

Well, that applies to people like Madonna, Prince and at one time, Michael Jackson. The fact that they refused to saturate the media with their faces made them more appreciated when they did make an appearance. That's not the case with some modern-day celebs. They try to get their face in every magazine or in front of every camera that they can. I realize that there are cell cams galore these days, but don't think some of these celebs don't seek them out.  I think that the younger generation of  fans has more patience with that, but for older guys like me, it drives me nuts. If I see/hear you every time I turn on my TV/radio, then I will get sick of you.

I hate hearing Lil' Wayne and Nicki Minaj on every single song that comes on the radio. If you drive an hour in your car and don't hear Lil' Wayne's or Nicki Minajs' voice at least four times apiece, then you must be listening to a country or gospel station. They not only have their own albums, but they will also perform on other people's albums as well.

Would Madonna make regular cameo appearances on someone else's CD? Heck, no! She's Madonna! An icon. A legend. She wouldn't play "second fiddle" with anyone like today's celebs do. When she performed in the Super Bowl back in January, she was the main attraction. As big as a star Cee-Lo is in today's pop culture, he was simply a background singer when Madonna was on stage. Cee-Lo went from "The Voice" to just "a voice" when Madonna was on the scene. Why? Because she's a legend.

There are many famous singers, but very few legends. Mariah. Mick. Whitney. Bruce. Prince. Celine. Santana. Aretha. I'm pretty sure that most of you know who these people are without me even having to list their full names. Why?



Because legends don't need them.

Why Do Everyday People Hate Famous People?

Snooki is an author.  Huh?

LeBron James.  Tiger Woods.  Snooki.  Charlie Sheen. People hate them. Well, maybe putting it that way is a tad bit strong, although it's true for some.  But, let me reword it: People hate on them.

Why is that?  What makes us not care for people we don't know? I'll list the three main reasons that people will take time out of their day to post, tweet, or comment about celebs:

Jealousy - Most of us fall into this category, but in different ways. There are women who hate on Beyonce because they're jealous of her. She looks good and sings well (at times) and because they don't have what she has, they analyze her with a microscope to find a flaw. "Oh, she's arrogant."  "She wears a weave." "Her booty is padded." Another way people are jealous, and I fall into this category, is that they hate to see people with very little talent become famous.  I hate on Snooki because she makes more money monthly than I do annually for being a moron and a drunk. Subconciously, I'm jealous of the fact that she had the guts (or lacked the common sense) to lay her dignity down to be the next national idiotic icon.

I can't even Super Size my meal for $21 million.

Resentment against them taking their opportunities for granted - Athletes receive a lot of hate based on this category.  No one group of people take their opportunities for granted like athletes. Quite a few of them will grow old and will end up broke, despite the fact that they once possesed millions. This brings about hate from the masses.  If you're working two jobs for $31k per year and you hear that Latrell Sprewell turned down an NBA contract that would have paid $21 million dollars over three years because he said that he couldn't "feed his family" off of it, then you can easily develop the hate gene.  For the record, Latrell never received another offer to play again after declining that contract and subsequently had his home and yacht repossesed. He is truly having some difficulties "feeding his family" from what I understand. Lindsay Lohan spends more time in court than making movies and we despise her for it. She has had the chance of a lifetime to enjoy being a Hollywood movie starlet and she's trying to blow it. She has an opportunity that many will never receive, yet it appears that she'd rather snort coke and steal things than make the most of what could have been an easy life.

Has a Ph.Double-D in sports.

Racism / Sexism / Media-influence - Let's not pretend as if any of the three don't exists. Prime examples: President Obama, Lebron James, Tiger Woods, Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann, any female ESPN reporter covering a man's sport; the list goes on. Naive people thought that racism died when Obama got elected, but it did the opposite: it's resurfaced its ugly head in the worst way. He has received opposition in everything he does and if you think it's just because he's a Democrat, then you also probably believed the world was ending back in May.

Female sports reporters have it bad. I'll be honest, I can't stand the ladies who were hired just because they looked good. There are a lot of sideline reporters or studio hosts who lack so much sports knowledge that they'll tell you there's a such thing as a "football bat." Lisa Guerrero? Jillian Barberie? Clueless! But there are also women who have sports in their blood and they know what they're talking about, yet they get little-to-no respect. Linda Cohn, Jemele Hill, Pam Ward, Michelle Tafoya, and Andrea Kramer to name a few notables. But some prehistoric men feel as if they belong either with pom poms in their hands and in short skirts or bringing them a beer. Sad.

Lebron James is hated for changing jobs. Think about it. He changed jobs! If you left McDonald's for Burger King, would you find it odd if every single customer for McD's hated you? Despite the fact that people have changed jobs since jobs were invented, they chose you out of everyone to hate. What happened to Lebron James is the result of media sensationalism. The media pounded him so much that we all started thinking, "Maybe this dude is a bad guy. He did do Cleveland wrong!"

No, he didn't.  The press conference he had, to announce "The Decision," may have been considered tasteless in the eyes of Cleveland, but it was ground-breaking to most everyone else.  We've seen press conferences of people changing sports teams, but never an entire show.  Lebron did something no one else has done before and made money for charity in doing so (along with pimping his new flavor of Lifewater products).  The same media outlet in which his show aired (ESPN) was also the same media outlet to demonize him to the public. "Oh, this was tasteless! How could he do this to the Cleveland fans?"

Yet, you jumped at the chance of broadcasting "The Decision" and bumped live sports off-air to do so. Hypocrites.

Only a warlock can love me.

So, we all have our reasons for being haters. We will hate someone just for being on TV. We will "boo" an athlete for playing a game. We will hurl insults to someone who is actually more talented than us.

Money and fame are such a powerful thing that it can drive a wedge between people who have never met.

Can The Minimum Wage Brothas Get Some Love, Too?

In today's society, we see Brad Pitt, LeBron James and even freakin' Justin Beiber with a following. They have fame, money and the spotlight in front of many cameras.

What if the world were different? What if the roles were reversed?

Instead of musicians, actors and athletes getting all of the glory, what if regular every day workers got the attention?

Imagine if Rasheed, Wal-mart employee, got all of the glory?

Instead of hundreds of cameras flashing just like when LeBron throws his ceremonial baby powder into the air before he starts work on the court, the cameras would flash when Rasheed clocks in to work!



His co-worker walks up on him and says, "Yo, Rasheed, you have six ladies waiting for you to handle clean up on Aisle 6 for that busted Pepsi Max 2-Liter."

"Man, I hate Wal-Mart groupies", replies Rasheed. "I just want to do my job and have my privacy like I told Oprah on her show last week."

Or maybe you're the guy working the overnight shift at FedEx Kinko's and you have 500,000 followers on your "CopyDeez" Twitter account.


You see, Carmelo Anthony doesn't have to be the only person ordering hits on Twitter.

Guys, can you imagine walking out of your job at Popeye's to be greeted by 20 screaming ladies at your car? "Nah, baby, I don't have any chicken for you tonight, boo."



Ladies, can the minimum wage brothas get some love, too? This is what I want every female who's reading this to do: get four of your finest friends, go to the nearest fast food restaurant and ask the guy working fries for his autograph. Break out the iPhone and take photos and post them on my "Thank, Q" Facebook page. Do whatever you can to make that guy's day. He may never realize why it's happening, but I guarantee you that he won't care. Look at it as a charitable flash mob event :)

Wow, it's truly dangerous for me to have too much free time on my hands. I'll blog about anything.